SINGAPORE: A man in his mid-20s took to social media to share that his father often criticised him for ‘having it easy’, even though he felt that couldn’t be further from the truth.
In an anonymous post to popular confessions page SGWhispers, the man wrote that his parents’ comments have driven “a bigger wedge into my r/s with my parents. We were never really on good terms to begin with but I don’t understand if it’s me who is wrong”.
He wrote: “I make x5 times starting salary my dad did when he was my age (mid-twenties). In his mid-twenties, he can get married, pay for BTO, have 3 kids. Sure, the first few years were a struggle, but he eventually also increased his salary gradually over a decade and lives a comfortable life now.
My dad was also paid for OT work horh, my mom never had to work except that time part time during the financial crisis”. He added that because of the pressure his parents placed on him, he worked very hard to earn above the average person. Despite this, he wrote that he still could not afford what they did when they were young.
“I can BTO with my gf, but we deffo can’t afford to have kids right off the bat. And we’re already in our late twenties. My parents like to say we have it easy. Say that we earn a lot of money, so should give them more allowance and all. Like you serious bro? If I give you money and luxury, you won’t have grandkids because we won’t be able to afford having children”, he wrote.
“I had a huge fight with my dad because he insist that Singapore’s system is perfect. If he can retire, we can also. And I’m not an economist, but I think he’s rly downplaying how much more difficult it is for us to survive, let alone thrive in our current situation. Things are just so much more expensive today than 30 years ago that our x5 starting salaries doesn’t justify sh*t”, the man added.
He wrote in his post that he knows his parents worked hard to raise them, but he said he was working hard too. He asked others in the group if their generation did have it easy.
Here’s what others commented:
Last month, the oldest of three brothers took to social media asking if he should have cared for himself more since his parents had decided to cut him out of his inheritance.
In an anonymous post to Facebook page SGWhispers, the man wrote that he was married, but his two younger brothers were not. “So my parents are already old and they told me that I’m not inheriting the HDB flat since I already have my own HDB flat. They don’t have any savings nor cpf since I’m the one giving the most allowance all these years”, he added.
The man wrote that he felt hurt, used and disappointed. “I don’t feel loved by my parents. I didn’t asked (sic) to be first born. As a first born, I take care of them the most including my younger siblings. I contributed the most and the longest. I have my own family too. I have to take care of my wife and my retirement”, he wrote. He explained that his wife’s family also excluded her from their will because she had a flat.
“I regretted a little, not to take care of myself more, and be a little more selfish to my parents and in-laws. Should I start being more selfish or should I pretend this is not hurting me and continue to give large allowances and presents? It’ll be very obvious if I do that. What do you all think?” the man wrote, asking netizens for advice.