SINGAPORE: A woman in her mid-to-late twenties recently turned to social media to express her confusion over feeling financially insecure despite accumulating significant wealth for her age.
“I am always pushing myself to save aggressively, which I find to be quite unhealthy mentally (e.g., starving myself to eat only 1 meal a day, not getting a new bag or shoes even when they are broken, rarely going on vacations or spending on food or Grab etc.), even though most of my colleagues / peers with the same or lower income level are splurging on such experiences,” the woman wrote on r/singaporefi on Sunday (Mar 10).
She shared that she has been aggressively saving around 85% of her income and that she gives her parents an allowance of S$1,500.
Although she did not provide the exact amount of her income, she said she made around 4–7 times the median post-tax income, both with and without bonuses.
Additionally, she has also made some fortunate investments. As a result of these financial habits and investments, she believes she has “accumulated what seems to be a top 1-2% net worth for my age bracket (25-29) in SG / US.”
“I don’t intend to retire until I’m 50/60 so there isn’t a need to save aggressively for early retirement. What is wrong with me? Should I get professional help?”
To give some background, the woman revealed that she grew up in a low-income household with a single parent. Throughout her schooling, from primary to university, she consistently relied on government support, scholarships, and bursaries.
She has also worked multiple part-time jobs to pay her way through college.
“Life is short. You can save everything, but if you’re not experiencing life, you’re missing out”
A few Redditors from Singapore said her habit of being extremely frugal might have stemmed from her upbringing. One person also thought that she might be dealing with financial trauma from her past struggles, which makes her fear going back to tough times.
As a result, this fear may lead her to prioritize saving and deny herself any form of enjoyment or reward, including vacations or even necessities.
One person offered some advice, saying, “Life is short. You can save everything but if you’re not experiencing life, you’re missing out. Money can’t be brought to the grave. Enjoy to a certain extent.”
Another added, “Saving 85% is not living your life if you don’t have something to look forward to and money to spend. As the saying goes, “The money is not yours until you spend it.”
Others who’ve had similar experiences also shared how they eventually overcame their financial trauma.
One individual said, “I’m in the same situation as you – high savings rate, job pays well, disciplined investment approach.
Took me a few years of reflection and advice from a doctor friend specializing in ICU (who sees death practically everyday) to recognise that nothing is more important than living a contented and fulfilled life.
My savings rate has since dropped substantially but I find myself somewhat more financially secure than ever.”
Financial trauma
Experts define financial trauma as the emotional and psychological distress caused by negative financial experiences in the past.
Examples of factors that can cause this condition are growing up in poverty, experiencing persistent financial hardships, sudden loss of employment, and unexpected events such as divorce or medical emergencies.
Going through this kind of trauma can often result in chronic stress, anxiety, and depression, which is why it is important to spot the signs of financial trauma early on so that one can take immediate action to fix it.
According to CPD Online College, these signs may include spending very little or being excessively thrifty, compulsive or impulsive spending to cope with emotional stress, constant worry about finances, and extreme fear of poverty.
Once identified, individuals are recommended to seek help from financial advisors or therapists to explore their feelings toward money and work towards finding a healthier balance between saving for the future and enjoying the present.
Read also: SG woman asks: “How do people maintain their savings” during job layoffs and rising cost of living?