SINGAPORE: A Singaporean man has allegedly neglected his parents, who dedicated 25 years to raising him, after starting a relationship with his girlfriend.
The story was shared by one of the man’s relatives on the Reddit forum r/askSingapore on Wednesday (Nov 28).
In the post, the relative explained that the man was able to achieve academic success and secure a well-paying job due to the relentless support and sacrifices of his parents. “They have consistently supported him through university,” the relative said.
The family’s relationship in the past was also described by the relative as being ‘close and filled with love and communication.’ Unfortunately, this dynamic changed after the man met his girlfriend.
“This relationship has had a profound impact on his lifestyle, causing him to adopt a frivolous attitude and neglect his social life. He has become overly dependent on his girlfriend and her family, spending most of his time at their residence,” the relative said. “Furthermore, his behavior towards his parents has deteriorated.”
The situation escalated when the man received his first work bonus. Instead of celebrating with his parents or acknowledging their support, he used the money to buy a pricey engagement ring for his girlfriend. He has also taken his girlfriend and her family on several trips but has never done the same for his own parents.
“They are deeply saddened by their son’s behavior and struggle to comprehend how he could become so ungrateful and forget their sacrifices,” the relative recounted.
“They feel that their relationship with their son has been diminished compared to his relationship with his girlfriend’s parents.”
The relative also clarified in the post that the parents were not expecting “any monetary rewards or attention for their actions,” and were merely concerned about their son’s unusual behavior.
According to the relative, the parents have tried to talk to their son about the issue, ‘but they have noticed that his attitude has only worsened.’
“It is difficult to comprehend how their son has undergone such a significant transformation within a span of 1.5 years. It is as if he has been subjected to some form of psychological manipulation or influence,” the relative explained.
The relative ended the post by asking for advice from anyone who’s dealt with a similar situation, as the family feels stuck and unsure how to move forward.
“This is the reality of raising children.”
Several Singaporean Redditors mentioned in the comments section that they’ve seen similar situations happen with their own family members as well.
One Redditor shared, “My brother is like this. Ever since he married his wife he totally became a different person. Same thing as what you wrote. He spends on the wife’s family more than his own parents. My parents are sad but what to do? How to address? We just avoid him and his wife now.”
Another commented, “Had a distant cousin who did this … very shocking as I recall hearing he was close to his parents. Met a girl and was fine with her not allowing him to see his family for long periods of time.”
Some Redditors speculated that the parents may have disapproved of the relationship from the start, which could explain why the son has chosen to distance himself from them.
One Redditor wrote, “It is always the parent’s first instinct to blame the son/daughter’s partner for changing their behavior.
If my parents are not welcoming of my gf or wife, I would be distant from them as well. Vice versa, if my gf or wife’s family shows hospitability towards me, of course I would repay the same.”
A few others also noted that situations like this are just part of the reality of parenting. One Redditor said, “This is the reality of raising children lol. What do you think ‘unconditional’ love was referring to? They suay that their kid is a simp lor.”
In other news, a young Singaporean took to social media to urge others not to take their parents for granted and to treat them with kindness and understanding, especially since life can be so unpredictable.
In her heartfelt post on r/SGexam, a Reddit forum, she shared how she had often taken her dad’s support for granted, not realizing all the sacrifices he made for her until he passed away from stomach cancer in 2020.
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