Two Asian women working together in front of a computer.

SINGAPORE: A woman took to social media asking if she was too soft-hearted and kind because she did not know how to get her money back from her friend who borrowed some.

In an anonymous post to popular confessions page SGWhispers, the woman wrote: “Basically early this year my friend asked if I could lend her money cause she’s broke so without 2nd thought I lent it to her. She promised to return back by next month. Then when time is up, I asked if she could return my money, she told me she will do it in the evening. So as a friend, I trusted her but later in the evening she did even not transfer”.

She added that she thought her friend had probably forgotten so she let the matter slide.

Later in the month when she reminded her friend, the latter said that she had transferred the money already.

However, upon checking her account, the woman said that there were no deposits from her friend. “So after, that she came back telling me that her account got issues cannot transfer. Fine! Few months later, I reminded her to transfer back the money she did not still”, the woman added.

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Recently when she reminded her friend, the latter again said she would do it in the evening of that very day. However, she still did not.

“I really don’t know how to ask for my money back…. Even though I’m not the person that owe others money but still I’m too shy to ask for my money back. I don’t know why I’m feeling this way, maybe because I don’t want to ruin the friendship????” the woman said.

Netizens who commented on the post told her to ask her friend directly.

One said: “Instead of asking for it back, ask her directly if she is having problems paying you back and why she needs to continually lie to you? Say you don’t want to lose your friendship but she needs to be honest with you. And if she truly is having problems try and find a solution eg can she pay small amounts every week? Have this conversation face to face”.

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Another netizen commented: “Your friend was the one who ruined the friendship, not you, when she decided to take your money and did not keep to her promise on when to return. I’ve seen far too many relationships and friendships ruined because of money. So lend only what you’re prepared to never get back. For me, I just tell my friends and whoever that I have very strict no money lending policy. It works 100% of the time. They mostly will respect your stand, or if they start accusing you of being heartless and cruel, then you’ll know if the person is a real friend who knows how to respect your boundaries. Good luck”.