SINGAPORE: A Singaporean worker took to social media to ask netizens which side they would choose if they were in her position. She wrote on r/askSingapore, a Reddit forum, “Would you rather be on good terms with your boss and lose out on being close to your colleagues? Or the other way around?”
In her post, she mentioned that her relationship with her boss has been pretty decent for the past seven months. However, this has made her feel isolated at work because her colleagues are intentionally excluding her from lunchtime gatherings due to her good rapport with the boss.
“I’m being outcasted a little by my other colleagues who go to lunch together, etc., because they often spend time talking about my boss and are probably worried I would tell on them or something, as I’m the only person reporting to her,” she wrote.
To complicate matters, her colleagues are also frustrated because whenever they ask her for assistance, her boss intervenes and tells them “she’s too busy”.
“In a way, it’s good for me,” she admitted. “She started doing this after two of my team members left, so now I’m the only one left with her, but it’s made me lose out with my colleagues la. So, what do you guys think?”
“Stay on good terms with the boss. Being in a ‘venting clique’ just makes the whole environment toxic for you.”
In the comments section, many Singaporean Redditors agreed that, in her situation, they would definitely side with the boss.
One Redditor pointed out, “Your colleagues are not your friends. Seems like your boss probably already knows the pattern of your colleagues; that’s why she’s butting in. Your colleagues want you to do things for them, but don’t include you for lunch.”
Another said, “Stay on good terms with the boss. Being in a ‘venting clique’ just makes the whole environment toxic for you. It’s not a good idea to get too close to those who like to gossip and complain.”
Additionally, many reminded her that her boss is the one in charge and holds the key to her career advancement. One Redditor remarked, “Your colleagues don’t promote you or give you raises. No brainer who to be on good terms with.”
Another reminded her, “Remember this: you don’t join a company to make friends. Colleagues aren’t in charge of your progression and pay.”
Some also advised her to find friendships outside of work, suggesting that it’s healthier to seek connections in other areas of her life rather than relying on her co-workers.
One Redditor commented, “Find friends outside of your work. Not saying it is impossible, but true friendship in the office environment is quite rare, I’d say. Work is there to fulfill your career ambitions. Use it as such.”
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