SINGAPORE: An elderly woman is allegedly pressuring her son-in-law, who earns around S$6,000-7,000 a month, to let her daughter quit her job and be “a full-time housewife and care for her grandson.”
A relative of the family shared the story on Reddit on Thursday (March 20), saying that the elderly woman even went as far as threatening her son-in-law with divorce. She told him she would convince her daughter to leave him if he refused to comply.
“It is very cruel pressure as he is only earning S$6-7K a month and needs his wife’s income to sustain the family’s upkeep. MIL thinks his salary is enough which I don’t think so,” the relative wrote.
Despite the ultimatum, the son-in-law was apparently unfazed and bluntly told her to “just go ahead.”
The relative then asked others in the forum, “Do you still know of older generation putting pressure on younger generation families to go single income? I wonder if you guys still face the same thing in a very expensive Singapore.”
“You’re giving up a lot when you go single income…”
In the discussion thread, many users were shocked by the mother-in-law’s demands, calling them “traditional,” unrealistic, and out of touch with Singapore’s high cost of living.
One user commented, “The MIL thinks today’s S$6-7K is the same as S$6-7K in her era.”
Another pointed out the financial strain this decision could cause, saying, “The ones that will suffer will be her daughter and grandson. Childcare expenses are so high, and unless they were born rich or have another source of reliable income, S$6-7k barely covers daily expenses. If MIL is so concerned for her grandson, she can step up and be the caretaker.”
A third echoed this sentiment, writing, “You’re giving up a lot when you go single income—your kids’ education, quality of life, healthcare access, and more. I get that kids benefit from a parent being present, but the financial burden is too high.”
He continued, “And I will say that the pressure won’t just stop there. Once the wife stops working, there’d be pressure on the husband to kill himself working so he can get a S$10k+ salary to cover the wife’s income as well. Everyone’s used to the dual-income quality of life already; going to single income would be a deterioration of close to 40% in terms of spending power.”
How much does a family need to survive in Singapore?
In 2023, researchers from Nanyang Technological University (NTU) found that a single parent raising a child aged 2–6 years old would need approximately S$3,369 per month to cover essential expenses such as housing, food, healthcare, education, and other daily necessities.
For a couple with two children—one aged 7 to 12 and the other between 13 and 18 years old—the required monthly income is estimated at S$6,693 Meanwhile, a single elderly person aged 65 and above would need around S$1,492 per month to afford basic living expenses.