Asian woman using her phone
'I’m lowkey a loser NEET with a trust fund': 22 y/o Singaporean asks how to explain her lifestyle to men she dates
SINGAPORE: A 22-year-old Singaporean has admitted she has no idea how to explain her lifestyle to the men she dates, given that she is currently a NEET (not in education, employment, or training) and has no plans to take up a conventional job for the time being.
On Thursday (Sep 24), she took to the r/asksg subreddit to ask fellow Singaporeans how she should respond when her dates ask what she does for a living.
For context, the woman explained that she grew up overseas in her father’s home country, where she attended a vocational college and earned a diploma in a specific low-paying field.
“I didn't go to poly or uni or anything. I started a small business with my parents in said field overseas, and it did pretty well! But we have since moved out of that country and came back to Singapore.”
She said her parents have never pressured her to pursue higher education or land a high-paying job, largely because she has been fortunate enough to inherit money from her family.
“They tell me that I don't need to get a degree and a high-paying job because I've been very lucky in life to inherit money from my family, and I have enough to sustain life without having to work.”
“Now that we are back in Singapore, I am currently just at home low-key doing nothing LOL I am just chilling. I don't really want to go back to school because, not going to lie, bro, I've always been kind of mid academically, and I hated school.”
She added that she owns an apartment in her own name, which generates a decent rental income, meaning she is financially able to support herself without a conventional career.
Seeking advice on how to handle questions about her background, she asked fellow Singaporeans: “How do I explain to all these fancy degree holders that even though I'm low-key a loser that does nothing, I'm not a loser? I don't know how to explain it. I just have no clue what to say to them. Do I just say I finished a diploma and started and ended a small business overseas?? I feel like that sounds so suspicious.”
“I’m very sorry if this sounds annoying, but I just don't want guys to think I'm a loser with no degree who is going to be a gold digger and leech (off) them for money when I say that I don't go to school and don't currently have a job.”
‘I don’t think the lack of a degree or job is the main issue here’
In the comments, several users told her that there was little point trying to come up with an elaborate explanation when she could simply be upfront about her circumstances.
“Actually, you can just be honest,” one user said. “Just acknowledge you have been very fortunate to live the life you had with the parents you have. The important thing is how you come off. Do you come off as stuck up? Or humble? Because if you can acknowledge you have been fortunate and show humility, kindness, and empathy, that’s a way more attractive trait than having superficial achievements.”
Another wrote, “Just say you did a diploma and ran a business overseas, now you manage your own property. That's not suspicious lah, that’s more than most 22-year-olds. Half those degree holders are paying rent to someone like you anyway. Gold digger with her own flat? Nobody thinks that.”
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Meanwhile, a third pointed out that what will really matter to the men she dates isn't her situation, but what her plans are for the future.
One said, “Honestly, I don’t think the lack of a degree or job is the main issue here.
I think what matters more when dating is what you actually want your life to look like going forward.”
“Do you want to start another business eventually? Pursue something else? Be a stay-at-home mum if you have kids? There’s no universally correct answer, but having some idea of what you want is probably more important than having a fancy degree.”
In other news, a divorced mother of three has turned to Reddit for help finding a job, saying she is running out of savings while struggling to find work that allows her to care for her children.
The 36-year-old woman said she had applied for numerous jobs but had yet to receive a response, leaving her increasingly worried about how she would support her family.