SINGAPORE: An HR professional felt demoralised after receiving feedback from her supervisor that she was an “introvert” who “had no rapport with her colleagues,” despite her efforts to engage with them.
Sharing her experience on the ‘Ask Singapore’ Reddit forum on Wednesday (March 12), she explained that she was an ISFJ (introverted, sensing, feeling, and judging) and had been working in her HR role for nine months. During her confirmation appraisal six months ago, her supervisor pointed out that she was an introvert and needed to build stronger relationships with her colleagues. She was advised to be more proactive in engaging with others, as her reserved nature was seen as a barrier to effective workplace interactions.
Taking this feedback to heart, she made a conscious effort to be more approachable in the office. “I have since tried to ‘make my presence more felt’ according to my supervisor, such as personally finding colleagues to talk/calliing them, instead of just only sending emails”, she wrote.
Moreover, she shared that when employees had their claims rejected by the system, she went beyond just sending automated emails and made an effort to call them personally to explain the reason for the rejection.
However, all her efforts seemed to have gone to waste after her supervisor once again highlighted during her second performance appraisal that her introversion was still a problem.
“My supervisor told me again I am an introvert. Straight point blank told me I have no rapport with my colleagues,” she said.
“I have been making small talk with my colleagues, calling them, finding them to talk work-wise, etc, not every day, but sometimes, as I do need the time to also sit down at my desk and concentrate on working. Basically, just trying to make my presence felt but maybe it is not enough for my supervisor? I do admit I can be quite an awkward turtle myself,” she added.
She also mentioned that she had worked in HR and administrative roles before but had never received any feedback about “lacking rapport with colleagues”.
Reflecting on the situation, she asked whether the problem lay in a personality difference between her and her supervisor, who was more assertive and strong-willed, or if it was a sign that HR was simply not the right fit for her.
“I am seriously considering whether I should continue working in HR. Seems like my introvert personality will be my downfall.,” she lamented.
“Introversion doesn’t make you a bad employee.”
In the discussion thread, many commenters reassured her that being an introvert does not mean she cannot excel in HR. They also encouraged her to keep going and not be too hard on herself.
One individual said, “Don’t let people tell you what you can or cannot do. I’m an introvert and I’m heading a sales team full of extroverts. Lol.”
Another commented, “Introversion doesn’t make you a bad employee. You are not there to gossip. Seems to me your boss just doesn’t like quiet people. My previous bosses actually don’t mind or ever prefer quiet employees – less drama, less gossip and less unnecessary problems.”
A third said, “I don’t believe that HR work specifically requires extroversion. You need to ask your supervisor to quantify what it means to ‘have rapport’, and state in certain terms what you have already done, and basically sort of suss out what they actually want you to be doing.”
Why introverts can do well in HR
Many people think introverts are not cut out for HR since it is such a people-centric field, but that is not necessarily true. In fact, introverts can thrive in HR by leveraging their natural strengths.
Deep thinkers and problem solvers
According to MindCypress, a global leader in skills development and professional training, introverts make great HR professionals because they are deep thinkers who take the time to analyse problems before finding solutions.
This is important in HR because handling employee concerns, resolving disputes, and making company-wide decisions all require careful thinking rather than quick, impulsive responses.
Bringing calm to the workplace
In high-pressure situations, introverts tend to stay composed, which can be reassuring to employees going through tough times. Whether it is handling workplace conflicts or navigating big organisational changes, having someone with a calm presence can make a big difference.
Strong observational skills
Introverts have a knack for picking up on small details that others might overlook, whether it is a subtle shift in someone’s mood or an unspoken tension in the workplace. This awareness helps them address issues before they escalate.
Great listeners
Introverts are naturally great at listening. They genuinely absorb what people are saying, ask thoughtful questions, and respond with well-considered solutions. This makes them especially effective in handling sensitive situations and making employees feel valued.
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