SINGAPORE: A 27-year-old man was stumped after his date criticized him for not owning a car.
In a post on Reddit’s ‘Ask Singapore’ forum, he shared that he had met the 28-year-old woman at a mutual friend’s party, where they ‘hit it off’ and exchanged numbers.
“We were texting for 2-3 weeks. So we decided to go on a date,” he explained.
However, things took an unexpected turn on the day of their outing. Early on, the man realized that the woman had done some prior research on him, having looked up his LinkedIn profile and social media.
She casually mentioned that ‘she knew where he worked’ and even commented on the ‘lucrative nature of his industry,’ hinting that she had pieced together a rough estimate of his financial situation.
“She would ask how much I spend and why I do not have a car despite my above-average salary,” he said.
“For context, I work in an investment bank, and I draw five figures monthly, but I am a thrifty guy, so I limit my consumption to S$1K, and for the rest, I save, invest, and pay the mortgage.”
He explained that he didn’t feel comfortable sharing all his financial details on a first date, so he kept his response simple:
“I have better use for my finances, and a car is a liability since I got an apartment in CBD, and my office is just a 5-7 minute walk away.”
Unfortunately, his reasoning didn’t seem to impress her. She responded by bringing up other men she’d dated who also lived in the CBD and owned cars.
“She said I should aim higher. She even said I should not make excuses for being unable to afford a car,” he explained further.
Though he managed to stay calm throughout the date, the experience made him question whether “the 5Cs are still what Singaporeans are chasing and if these material possessions still judge us.”
Growing up, he recalled hearing the older generation speak about the 5Cs—Cash, Car, Condo, Credit Card, and Country Club Membership—as the ultimate measure of success.
The belief was that once you attained all five, you were living the “Singaporean dream.”
“I always thought this idea was very passé and that there are other ways to measure success now—until recently when I went on a date with this girl,” he wrote.
“The 5 Cs have been outdated for quite a while now”
In the comments section, many Singaporean Redditors chimed in, with several expressing that they found the woman’s behaviour toxic and materialistic.
One Redditor said, “She’s only after you because she knows your industry is lucrative, and you’re likely to be above average in monetary terms.”
Another commented, “I’m a girl, and it’s pretty weird and rude for her to question such things on the first date.
It’s not wrong to be curious about a man’s salary and background if you’re looking at him as a potential partner and need stability, but there is an appropriate timing for that.”
Others observed that while the 5 Cs might still hold appeal for some, many in today’s generation prioritize financial independence, freedom, and meaningful experiences over mere status symbols.
One Redditor added, “The 5 Cs have been outdated for quite a while now, especially for those in their 20s and 30s. You can forget about condos unless you already are upper middle class.
Nobody in that age range cares about country clubs. Cars are more about trading money for time rather than a pure luxury.”
Earlier this year, many Singaporeans also openly admitted that instead of fixating on the 5 Cs, they are now focusing on more meaningful goals, like achieving financial independence and early retirement (FIRE).
They pointed out that country clubs have been irrelevant for years and that nearly everyone now owns a credit card—even those with low income.
Housing prices have also surged since COVID-19, with any decent-sized condo costing around more than S$1 million, making it unlikely that most people aim to own one.
Featured image by Depositphotos (for illustration purposes only)