SINGAPORE: A woman about to be married found it strange that she only met her fiancé’s family twice a year. In an anonymous post to popular confessions page SGWhispers, the woman wrote that she had been in a 6-year relationship with her fiancé and added that they would be married soon.
“So far he has been hanging out with my family more regularly (around once a week), and my family loves him. I try to invite him for any events/celebrations happening at my house. On the other hand, I seldom get to hang out with his family (much less to be invited to his family gatherings), I see them maybe around once/twice a year?”, the woman said in her post.
She added that she used to think that the situation would improve once they got married but added that things would only change if she spoke up. “I don’t want to self invite to his family gatherings unless he really want me there. I mean even a casual lunch (where he will already be eating with his fam) also ok, don’t even need to be a celebration to be hanging out tgt”, she wrote.
In her post, the woman asked netizens: “Is it realistic that a married couple would be spending more time together with either families or do the individuals still go about to do their own things with their own families without inviting their partners along?”
Netizens who commented on the post gave her suggestions on her situation. One said: “Why don’t you initiate an outing tgt with his family couple of times and see how it goes? Then you’ll see maybe why.. weird family habits? Or probably your fiancé is protecting you. However I will not leave it because it’s not normal to be not invited for family gatherings if you’re engaged and getting married unless something happen before”.
Another netizen commented: “Eh. Well. I would say my partner’s mom likes hosting (according to him) and my parents find it a “hassle” to have people over coz they feel they need to make the house presentable and need to behave in a certain way when guests are over. so y’know, I’ve definitely spent more time with his parents than he has mine. For after marriage, it depends on a lot of things I guess? If at least one person’s family “demands” to have dinner with their married child 3 times a week and the partner have other things to do, then it’s likely that the partner won’t show up for all the dinners. If it’s one a week or every 2 weeks, it makes sense that the couple joins the meals together”.