The anguish a person feels after a loved one takes their own life was the subject of a recent post on the anonymous NUS Whispers Facebook page.
As they began their post with a trigger warning due to “Sensitive material on suicide,” we issue the same warning that this article contains potentially distressing material for certain readers.
The netizen appeared to address someone close to them who had died by suicide, which is the leading cause of death among Singapore youths for the third year in a row., according to a Samaritans of Singapore published last July.
“I’m angry. It’s been over a year, since you’ve taken your life. I still can’t understand how you’ve mustered the courage to leave everything behind. The saying, ‘you’ll only understand when you’ve become them.’ Probably means I have not reached you. For better or for worse,” they wrote.
Because the netizen is “a soldier by profession,” they said, “I’ve steeled myself to letting people go. To watch my friends fall for a common and just cause.”
And while they’ve endured “some of the toughest training the military has to offer” learning of the person’s death made them cry “like a baby fresh off the teat.”
“I still think about what more I could’ve done even when I know I’ve done everything I could,” the netizen added.
The reason for the suicide seemed to be relationship related, as the netizen wrote that “you took your life because of this country’s lifestyle and some bitch that didn’t know your worth.”
But the death left the netizen with much anguish.
“Where the hell does that leave me…
I’ve failed.
Who am I to defend when the people I’m supposed to defend leaves before me.
I’m ready. Ready for people to leave. Just not like this,” they added.
The post ended with an appeal for people who are in a similar situation to get the help they need.
“Please. The amount of hurt you’ll inflict to people who care for you when you end your own life is insurmountable. Everyone has their own reasons. Talk to somebody. Scream. Cry. Don’t leave people like us behind.”
If you or anyone you know is struggling with mental health issues, the following helplines are available:
- National Care Hotline: 1800-202-6868 (8 am—12 am)
- Institute of Mental Health’s Mental Health Helpline: 6389-2222 (24 hours)
- Samaritans of Singapore: 1800-221-4444 (24 hours) /1-767 (24 hours)
- Singapore Association for Mental Health: 1800-283-7019
- Silver Ribbon Singapore: 6386-1928
- Tinkle Friend: 1800-274-4788 and www.tinklefriend.sg
- Community Health Assessment Team: 6493-6500/1 and www.chat.mentalhealth.sg
/TISG
Suicide remains leading cause of death among Singapore youths for 3rd year in a row