SINGAPORE: An employer who noticed a huge change in his maid’s behaviour after getting a boyfriend here asked: “is having a bf while married a deal breaker?”
In a post to a support group on Facebook for domestic helpers and employers alike, the man wrote that his helper worked for the family for four years. She’s married and has a daughter back home and “used to be a very hardworking helper”, he said.
“But i found out that she has a bangladeshi boyfriend and has started to dress up very differently from before, no more headscarf and more makeup, perfume and tighter clothes”, he wrote. The man added that while she still did her work, her attitude was very different, where she became more argumentative and was a bit defiant as well. When given instructions, she would look bored or show a “black face”, he added.
“Also texting alot more, hiding in her room etc. She also secretly took some of my wine and passed out at home, i had to send her to GP”, the man wrote in his post.
He asked others in the group if having a boyfriend while being married was a deal breaker. He said that while it was indeed her personal business, it made her much more distracted, and there was the risk of pregnancy or bringing the guy to his house when the family went out.
Here’s what netizens who commented on the post said:
Earlier this year, another puzzled employer took to social media sharing the situation where her maid ran away, taking only her passport with her. In an anonymous post, the employer wrote that the maid also left behind all her belongings and Work Permit.
Sharing her situation to a Facebook group for employers and helpers, the woman wrote: “Today, I am upset with the sudden missing of a helper whom I have treated like my own family. Given her all the flexibility, care and concern. I never expect that being kind and nice, my helper would still run away. Her job was never difficult coz I’ve been doing it myself all this while. I really take care of her”.
The employer added that her maid had more rest time than work, where the maid only had to cook dinner when her employer’s children were in school. The helper would then get to rest from 1 pm to 5.30 pm as no one would be at home. /TISG