SINGAPORE: A young Singaporean took to Reddit to ask if it’s normal for parents to “demand” a monthly allowance from their adult kids in exchange for letting them live at home.
In a recent post on the SG exams forum, he shared his situation: “My dad is demanding a minimum of $1,000 a month from my older brother after he graduated, in exchange for continuing to stay with us. Is it normal?? My brother feels like $500 is enough.”
The young Singaporean also shared his thoughts, saying he wouldn’t mind supporting his parents financially after graduating, especially since they’ve made sacrifices and need to plan for retirement. But he couldn’t help but wonder: is this the norm, or is his dad asking for too much?
“Please share your experience living with your parents; thank you,” he wrote.
“Your brother is an adult, not a dependent anymore…”
Singaporean Redditors were divided on the issue. Some felt it was reasonable for parents to ask for financial support from their adult children, especially when living under the same roof.
They argued that it’s a way for children to show gratitude for their parents’ sacrifices and contribute to the household.
One Redditor said, “Your brother is an adult, not a dependent anymore. Bills need paying, food needs cooking/buying, and the wheels that turn the sustenance engine need turning.”
Another commented, “$1000 is just about right as it’s the rental rate for a room right now. My dad asked me to pay rent as soon as I turned 18, but as a nudge for me to be independent.”
Others, however, felt that the amount being asked for might be too much, especially if his brother was just starting out in his career.
One Redditor commented, “It’s normal to give parents a bit of cash once working for the reasons you cited, but 1K a month can be pretty steep when stacked against his actual take-home pay.
For context, that amount could easily pay for an HDB room rental, with some spare for other use.”
Another explained, “$1K a month might as well rent outside. At least there is no need to deal with parents. This is not normal and children are not retirement plans nor investment plans.”
Singaporeans feel responsible for supporting their parents financially
In 2023, The Straits Times conducted an online survey with 1,000 Singaporeans and found that about 75% of children give their parents a monthly allowance. Around half of them contribute between $300 and $500 a month, while others give around 10% to 20% of their salary.
This suggests that many adult children in Singapore feel a strong sense of responsibility to help their parents financially once they start earning.
However, it’s important to note that not everyone can afford to give extra money to their parents. Family life specialist Susan Koh from Focus on the Family Singapore points out that some individuals may face financial struggles or have lower-paying jobs.
In these situations, Koh encourages adult children to have open and honest discussions with their parents about what they can realistically afford.
If someone is earning less or experiencing financial struggles, Koh recommends exploring alternative ways to support parents.
This could include topping up their parents’ CPF accounts, covering the cost of meals when dining out, or contributing to household expenses such as groceries, utility bills, or internet subscriptions.
Featured image by Depositphotos(for illustration purposes only)