SINGAPORE: A Singaporean felt completely defeated after his father backed out of financially supporting his university education.
In a post on Reddit’s ‘Ask Singapore’ forum, he shared his struggles in detail, explaining how he initially had no intention of continuing his education after graduating with a diploma.
He was already grappling with the challenge of supporting himself with a part-time job, just scraping by to cover basic expenses like food, transport, and phone bills. His mental health had also been deteriorating, making it difficult to focus on any long-term goals or aspirations.
Despite his struggles, his father remained adamant that he should go to university. “I was pressured to go to uni, my only option was private so I applied and got an offer. At first my father told me not to worry too much and just accept, he would handle the finances,” he explained.
“We took out a study loan after that, the agreement with my father was that he would pay during my schooling days and once I graduate, the rest would be on me. I was okay with this as it was the least I could do to not disappoint them anymore,” he added.
However, just as he was starting to make peace with the situation, his father unexpectedly backed out of their agreement.
This left the young man blindsided and feeling more lost than ever. He shared that he only works enough to cover his basic needs and bills, but “his mental state is so bad” that working more feels impossible.
He knows others may not even have the chance to continue their studies and have to go straight into the workforce, and he’s not ungrateful for the opportunity to study. But the weight of the situation has left him feeling drained.
“I just feel so tired, I want to quit work, I want to drop out, I don’t enjoy a single of my hobbies anymore,” he wrote.
“I spend my time between school-work-sleeping. It’s eating away at me and I feel like I’m at my lowest, there’s no motivation to continue.”
‘I think you might need to talk to your mom about it’
In the comments section, many advised the young Singaporean to reach out to a mental health professional for support, or at the very least, talk to his mother about what he’s going through.
One individual said, “Damn bro, it’s tough. I think you might need to talk to your mom about it and tell her it’s really serious.
“Your father on the other hand thinks that ‘pushing you’ is the best way. That’s why find your mother and really let her know your thoughts and feeling.”
Another commented, “Go to your GP or polyclinic and get a referral for a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist will give a diagnosis and offer solutions to help you overcome your problem. In the meantime, get exercise.
“Go for long walk or hike at a local hiking trail. Check out NPark for hiking trails. Jog, yoga, gym class, etc. these are good ways to get endorphins released into your body.”
Meanwhile, others shared that they had also gone through similar experiences with their own parents.
One individual wrote, “My dad pulled the same stuff last time on me. Make an appointment with the bank and ask if you can defer the rest of the payment until you start working. They will adjust for you. Good luck.”
In another case, a university student shared on social media earlier this year that her parents told her she’d have to pay her tuition fees herself.
“They keep telling me that other students also do this, and it’s very normal. Is it really very common for uni students to pay their own school fees??” the student asked on r/SGexams on Saturday (Feb 24).
Read more: Uni student shocked after her parents told her to pay for her own tuition fees
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