An angmoh guy who had been in Singapore for about 8 years took to social media asking why so much pressure is placed on children to excel. In an anonymous post to popular confessions page SGWhispers on Tuesday (Nov 15), the man wrote that his first local friends used to complain a lot about their tiger parents.
Tiger parenting is a form of strict parenting, whereby parents are highly invested in ensuring their children’s success. Specifically, tiger parents push their children to attain high levels of academic achievement or success in high-status extracurricular activities such as music or sports.
“All the pain they went though, from extra tutoring, always having to study, banned from having romantic relationships and ensuring to be home for dinner even when they are full grown adults. I think the worst aspect was not being able to meet their parents high expectations even with amazing performance”, the man wrote.
He continued: Now that his friends have their own children, he was surprised to see that they were doing the same thing their parents did to them. “In some cases even harder – like enrichment classes when their kids are still babies!!” the man wrote.
“Can someone tell me why they repeat this toxic behaviour? I don’t get it, especially when there’s little evidence that pushing your kids so hard actually helps them”, he added.
Here’s what netizens said:
Not all Singaporeans regard being a tiger parent as a bad thing. Workers’ Party Member of Parliament Jamus Lim paid tribute to his mother, whom he called “a Tiger Mom, perhaps thrice over”.
And while the term has been used negatively at times, Prof Lim choose to point out the best qualities that tigers have, as he wished everyone “a wonderful year of the Tiger, filled with the sort of tigerly traits that we all could use as we pull ourselves out of the difficult year past.”
The Sengkang GRC MP explained in a Facebook post that his “dearest mother” had been born in the year of the Tiger.
“She also raised my sister and me as a typical strict Asian mother would. And like many Singaporean mothers, she worked full-time, fighting to supplement the family income.”
He acknowledged, however, that the term “Tiger Mom” is “often used derisively” and “often gets short shrift.”
But he pointed out that “tigers are regal beasts, the largest and strongest of the great cats (even though the lion is frequently thought to be bigger).”
And in the Chinese zodiac, the tiger is seen as “an equal rival… to the typically more well-regarded dragon,” he added, before going on to praise his own “Tiger Mom.”