SINGAPORE: A man who had to take money from his mother for his education wanted to know if he should take a loan to repay her if it meant he could salvage their relationship.

In an anonymous post to popular confessions page SGWhispers, the man said he still had family ties back in his home country, where his parents still lived. He said that his parents generously spent a significant amount of money, about $120,000, to fund his education. He did not state which currency this amount was in.

“Additionally, a few years ago, I purchased a house for them to live in and they spent 150K on its renovation. Unfortunately, my relationship with my mother has deteriorated over the past year due to favoritism issues. Whenever we attempt to discuss unrelated matters, my mother consistently brings up the fact that she used her retirement savings to cover the expenses totaling 120K+150K, emphasizing that she hasn’t spent a single cent on herself”, the man wrote.

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He added that her repeated comments had become exhausting, and he wanted to repay the sum to break free. However, the man noted that it would take him several years to accumulate the amount, and his “parents may not live long enough to witness this repayment. Hence, I’m contemplating whether it would be wise to take out a loan to repay my mother, and shoulder the burden of the monthly installments myself”.

“I would greatly appreciate any advice you might have to offer. It’s important to note that, for the time being, engaging in a conversation with my mother to mend our relationship seems impossible”, he wrote, asking netizens for advice.
Here’s what they said:

Earlier this year, a woman dating a “Mama’s Boy” took to social media asking if this was a dealbreaker. In an anonymous post to popular confessions page SGWhispers, the woman said that both she and her boyfriend were in their early 30s and dating for about 5 months now. “From what I know he is very close with his mum, and he does share a lot of our r/s stuff with his mum, which honestly makes it a little uncomfortable because who knows what he filters?” she wrote. She added that her boyfriend would also consult his mother for things he wants to do and run them by her.

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“And apparently his mum still looks over his finances??? I can understand asking for advice kind but I feel like otherwise, at this age, he should be more or less, if not fully independent”, the woman wrote.

She added that she had not yet met her boyfriend’s mother but anticipated that they would be meeting soon. She asked if she should see how things play out or speak to her boyfriend about his reliance on his mother. She also wanted to know if she should just walk away altogether.

Woman says her 30-year-old boyfriend still needs his mother to make decisions; she also looks over his finances