SINGAPORE: A Singaporean student took to social media to recount how her mum accused her of being selfish when she declined to give her dad $700 from her $2000 contest winnings.
In her post on r/SGexams, she explained that she intended to split the money four ways: $100 each for her older sister and mum, $400 for her dad, and the rest for herself.
“I told my mum that I will need around 1400+ (using the award money) for the ipad that I’m buying. The course I’m taking currently requires an iPad and I didn’t want to burden my parents by telling them I needed an iPad for my schoolwork,” she said.
However, things escalated when her dad insisted that she give him an extra $300, on top of the $400 she planned to give him, for their trip to Australia.
When she disagreed, her parents reacted defensively and told her that she wasn’t a filial daughter. They even attempted to make her feel guilty by mentioning the time her dad bought her a computer.
“I found it a little unreasonable since my mum already told me to get an iPad myself, but she still called me selfish just because I’m not giving my dad $700,” she opined.
The student disclosed that this wasn’t the first time she’d been asked to share her winnings from awards or competitions with the whole family.
“As far as I recall, every-time I get an award or win a competition, my mum would ask me to share some of the money with the family as she insists that it’s a way to train my sister and I to be filial when we grow up next time,” she added sharing her stressful family situation.
“Take this as a $700 lesson.”
Many Singaporeans found it unfair that she was expected to split her winnings with her entire family and also contribute towards their trip to Australia.
One individual asked the student, “Is money tight at home? You are already very filial to pay for the iPad yourself and still split the remaining amongst family. It seems like you cannot make everyone happy.”
Some also pointed out that she was still under her parents’ care and hadn’t landed a full-time job yet, so it didn’t make sense for her to hand over her hard-earned money to her parents when she had her own expenses to worry about.
A few also stressed that while it’s important to take care of one’s parents, it shouldn’t come at the expense of one’s own financial stability. They thought parents should be more mindful of how they ask for help from their kids, considering the pressures young adults face these days.
One individual said, “Yet another case of parents who don’t understand that giving birth to a child is their choice, not ours.
It is a moral duty to provide the child with the best life you can for this life is one that you forced upon it. Its not an act of charity and they aren’t owed anything.”
They then advised her to just ignore her parents’ requests and take it as a lesson for the future—that she should keep her salary and bonuses to herself, even from her family and her future spouse.
One individual commented, “Just from this story it hints at what’s gonna come when you start working in the future. Think twice before you disclose your earnings and savings. Take this as a $700 lesson.”
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