SINGAPORE: A Singaporean took to social media to share his concerns about the fading spirit of Chinese New Year (CNY) gatherings, particularly among the younger generation.
He reflected on how, over the years, these reunions had gradually lost their warmth as younger family members seemed less interested in spending time together.
In a post on the r/SGexams subreddit, he shared his experience attending this year’s CNY reunion at his cousin’s house, a long-standing tradition in his family.
“Like always, I have to start a conversation with my cousins of +-1 my age (26M). Every time I do, it sounds like an interrogation as they just give me answers and say nothing else,” he wrote. “They don’t even pretend to be interested. After dinner, they just went to hide in their rooms.”
He also recalled how, two years ago, his cousins were blatantly using their phones in front of him while he was trying to talk to them. “They keep replying ‘yes’ or ‘no’ then go on to play,” he said.
What worries him the most is the thought that once their parents, who are now in their 60s, stop organizing these gatherings, there may no longer be a reason for them to meet. “The reason why our families still meet up is because they used to live and play together,” he said.
However, as this older generation ages, the responsibility of maintaining family ties will inevitably fall on the younger generation. Given how disengaged his cousins are already, he worries that they won’t try to keep in touch in the future.
“When else do they want to start chatting? And it’s not like they are bad socially. I heard from their moms that they have a lot of friends, even when they were playing phones when we met during past CNY they were messaging friends,” he said.
“I’m supposed to be the socially awkward one without many friends. Even if I followed them and played with my phone, there is no one messaging me,” he added.
He ended his post by asking, “Anyone face similar stuff? Am I the only one who feels the pressure of upholding families ties at my age?”
‘People are now less likely to put up with toxic elders for the sake of family unity’
Many users joined the discussion to share their thoughts and experiences. Some agreed with the Singaporean, saying that they also felt that the spirit of CNY is dying with the younger generation.
One user explained that younger people are more practical now and no longer see much value in the CNY festivities. He added, “I can easily see CNY fading away over the next 30 years as the current generation phases out.”
A few users also highlighted that toxic relatives are part of the problem. The uncomfortable conversations, filled with probing questions about personal decisions, careers, and relationships, have made some younger people start avoiding family gatherings altogether.
One user even wrote, “Grim? Nah. I wish the tradition would die. The only reason I still go is because my mother is still alive. I’ve gone from many houses to visit, to 3, to today? 1. Toxic family relatives. One year, one time, keep asking you stupid questions. ‘Got promote or not?’ ‘When get kid?’ Now got kid, ‘Your kid attend special school?’ Yes, I was asked that even though my child has no special needs.”
Another commented, “People are now less likely to put up with toxic elders for the sake of ‘family unity’, and Singaporeans are raised in small families. Let’s face it, how many of us prioritise our relatives whom we don’t see regularly over our close friends?”
However, not everyone agrees with the sentiment that CNY gatherings are fading. One user shared, “I think it depends on how close your cousins and their kids are — I’m happy to visit my elder relatives and host CNY luncheons and dinners and TCSS with them. I used to visit for the gambling tradition and I already see that in my younger cousins and even next gen.”
In other news, another Singaporean has gone online to complain about CNY price hikes—this time, over coffee at a hawker centre.
“Now, I understand that costs may fluctuate, but this feels excessive, especially during a time of celebration like Chinese New Year,” he wrote. “While I understand businesses need to profit, this price hike feels exploitative. Perhaps there could be a more balanced approach, with a moderate price increase instead of such a significant jump,” he added.
Featured image by Depositphotos (for illustration purposes only)