SINGAPORE: Most young relationships frequently end in breakups, often as a way to teach us valuable lessons about ourselves and our needs. However, one young man seemed to notice that in Singapore, breakups always occur shortly after the guy is conscripted into National Service.
Taking to r/askSingapore, the young man admitted that he himself experienced this. He said, “I recently enlisted in National Service, and not long after, I was dumped.”
To his surprise, he discovered that his situation was not unique. It turned out that “almost every guy in his section” had a similar tale to tell, whether it was getting dumped or cheated on right after starting NS. “It seems to be a common experience among those serving,” he added.
Eager to understand why this happens, he decided to seek answers from the forum. He posed a question directed at the Singaporean women in the community, asking, “What led you to end or betray a relationship while your boyfriend was in NS?”
“This is a space free of judgment and criticism, where you can share your honest experiences. I’m genuinely curious to understand the reasons behind these decisions.”
“It’s a cycle that is part of Singapore culture.”
Several women chimed in to discussion and shared why they decided to end their relationships during their boyfriends’ National Service (NS).
One netizen explained that it wasn’t the distance that caused her breakup, but rather how her boyfriend’s behavior changed. He became super possessive and jealous, creating a toxic environment she couldn’t deal with anymore. He didn’t want her going out or even attending school orientations. When she pushed back, he called her “a terrible partner” and accused her of not being supportive.
Another commenter shared that she ended things because her ex just wouldn’t stop talking about NS. Every conversation was a complaint about his sergeants, the food, or something else. After a while, she got tired of all the negativity. She felt the relationship had lost its spark and started seeing him as immature, which led her to break up with him.
Meanwhile, a third commenter confessed that she was actually the one who got cheated on. Her boyfriend claimed he “needed to stay on weekends” for NS, but she eventually discovered it was a complete lie and he was actually spending those weekends with other girls behind her back.
A few men also shared their experiences in the thread, adding to the list of reasons why women break up with their partners during NS.
One Reddit user revealed, “My gf cheated on me as well in NS and we broke up. When I went to uni I met a girl who cheated on her NS bf with me. It’s a cycle that is part of Singapore culture.”
Another added, “When you go to NS and your gf got a new job, they will meet more established male and that is definitely more attractive. But don’t blame NS, because this incident teaches you how life truly is. If you are not capable, your gf may move on that’s a fact of life. Focus on yourself for now, perhaps think of r/s after you have stabilize yourself and want to start sharing your wealth and accomplishments with another.”
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