SINGAPORE: Why are some Singaporean men still single in their 40s? A Singaporean man on social media shared that many men in their 40s remain single because Singaporean women want “rich, powerful, smart, eloquent, and handsome men.”
This conversation was prompted by another man who took to social media to ask why Singaporean men in their 40s are still single. He asked, “Is this due to societal pressures, personal choices, or a shift in beliefs about marriage?”
Singaporeans online shared different reasons. Some mentioned past heartbreaks they have not yet overcome. Others shared that being single meant only worrying about yourself, unlike getting married, which “unlocks a set of different problems,” like dealing with in-laws, balancing responsibilities with a partner, and raising kids.
One commenter suggested that the issue primarily lies with the expectations placed on both genders. According to him, Singaporean women often look for rich, powerful, smart, eloquent, and handsome men.
In contrast, Singaporean men look for “women who are not whiny,” are independent, good-looking, articulate, and not focused on branded goods.
He said, “I know many friends who chose to remain single and if this can help increase the overall net happiness index for Singapore, I’m all for it.”
However, he also pointed out, “Singapore is facing a crisis – loneliness and lack of fulfilment or purpose. You don’t see many people who have a purpose – everyone is just trying to play the survival game and make ends meet.”
He added that the culture of Singapore does not ironically support individuals who want to start a family: “It’s all about money and finances.”
Another commenter also echoed this sentiment: “Not chasing money or excellence seems to be a sin and being content living a simple life is unattractive.”
On the other hand, some people emphasise that marriage should not be seen as a societal necessity.“Marriage should not be viewed as a necessity in today’s world. Live well by yourself and consider a relationship only if the right person comes along.
It is perfectly normal to not find the right person,” one commenter said.
A man in his early thirties shared his perspective on unhappy marriages, noting, “The number of people who get into marriages without understanding love and commitment, often blinded by the prospect of buying a Build-To-Order (BTO) flat, is astounding.
I value my freedom greatly and have yet to find someone who complements me enough to give that up. Until then, being single is preferable to settling for someone less compatible.” /TISG
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