SINGAPORE: A man took to social media to share a story about how his teacher profoundly influenced his mindset during his school years.
In a post on Reddit’s r/AskSingapore forum, he recounted how, as a student, he often struggled with self-doubt and lacked confidence in his abilities. There was one teacher, however, who never let him blend into the background.
This teacher would often call on him to answer questions, even though he rarely knew the answer. Over time, he grew frustrated and started defaulting to the same response whenever he was put on the spot: “I don’t know la, I’m not smart.”
It became his shield— a way to avoid embarrassment and the pressure of getting things wrong in front of his classmates. But no matter how many times he used this excuse, his teacher never let him off the hook. Instead, he insisted that the man at least try, challenging him to think rather than immediately surrender to the fear of failure.
One day, exhausted from being repeatedly singled out, the man confronted his teacher and asked why he kept calling on him when he knew he never had the answers.
“He told me because he knows I’m not stupid. It’s just after a few setbacks, I developed the mindset of saying ‘I don’t know’ without trying. And because of this defeated mindset [and] convenient excuse, I never try.
“And he purposely calls me out so I can try, and even if I get it wrong, I know that there’s actually no harm in not knowing the answer—in fact, it’s a learning opportunity. He said my biggest problem is my mindset, and without a change in mindset, it’s difficult for me to move on,” the man recalled
At the time, the man brushed it off as yet another lecture from a teacher who just didn’t understand his struggles. But years later, as an adult, he finally saw the profound truth in those words.
He realized that every time he faced a challenge, his initial reaction dictated his chances of overcoming it. If his first instinct was to give up, then he had already failed before he even tried.
“Now, I consciously stop myself every time I want to say ‘I don’t know.’ I pause and think: ‘Do I really not know?’ or ‘Is this a convenient excuse?’ And if I really don’t know, what can I do? I no longer take ‘I don’t know’ as an answer to my challenge,” he shared.
Beyond that, he also learned that making mistakes wasn’t something to be ashamed of. Instead of fearing failure, he now embraced it as a natural part of learning. He even allowed himself to laugh at his own mistakes, realizing that they were not setbacks, but stepping stones towards growth.
Looking back, he expressed deep gratitude to his teacher for imparting a lesson that shaped not just his academic journey, but also his approach to life.
Inspired by his experience, he turned to fellow forum members and asked, “What is a tough but important lesson you learnt in life?”
Singaporeans share their own eye-opening life lessons
His story struck a chord with many users, sparking a flood of responses as people shared their eye-opening life lessons. Many reflected on their workplace experiences.
One commented, “A lot of colleagues are not your friends. Most are situational friendships and can turn on you anytime. Don’t bad mouth/gossip and stay out of drama in [the] workplace.”
Another wrote, “Don’t ever believe the ‘We are a family’ stuff at the workplace. Just do your job and enjoy your own life at every possible moment.”
A third pointed out, “You can give your 110%, be proactive, and go above and beyond all you want in your job and still get laid off if your company makes poor directional decisions. A business is just a business, after all. Businesses don’t care about your survival but only their own profit and survival.”
Beyond workplace lessons, some users opened up about broader life experiences, discussing the unpredictability of success, personal growth, and self-acceptance.
One shared, “One of the hardest lessons I’ve learned is that sometimes, no matter how much effort you put in, how well you plan, or how much you deserve success, things just don’t work out. And it’s not always your fault. Life just goes on as usual shrug.”
Another added, “You’re always going to be young in someone’s eyes and old in someone else’s, talented to one and terrible to the next. The world’s never going to agree on a definition of what you are so you might as well ignore that stuff and be whoever [you] wanna be for yourself.”
A third remarked, “99% of [the] population doesn’t care what you look like or do. They are focused on themselves. The sooner you realise this, the freer you are.”
In other news, a foreigner took to Reddit to ask Singaporeans what kind of lifestyle he and his family should expect when relocating to Singapore with a household income of S$400k per year.
“My wife recently got promoted, and we will be moving to Singapore for three years. I’m trying to mentally prepare for the different lifestyle we will have in Singapore and most importantly have realistic expectations on how different our lifestyle will be (if at all) based on our income,” he wrote on the ‘Ask Singapore’ forum on Saturday (Feb 8).
Read more: What sort of lifestyle should we expect in Singapore with S$400K/year as an expat?
Featured image by freepik (for illustration purposes only)