Relationships are not an easy business to navigate, and it’s ten times harder if you’re involved with a married man. Bad enough that many women have to bear the tag of home wrecker and, for some who have married themselves, the scarlet letter of adultery.
No one sets out to be in such a predicament, but here’s how to know when your relationship with him is legitimate or if he is just stringing you along.
Some of the signs to look out for are:
- His wife has no clue about your existence. He may be telling you that it’s all over between them or that he is in an open relationship, but if his wife has no idea that you exist, it’s a bad sign.
- You only meet at times and places that are suitable for him. Is the entire relationship revolving around his timing and when he is free? If so, that isn’t a good thing at all. He should be able to be there for you when you have had a tough day as well. It shouldn’t just be a one-way street.
- You haven’t met his friends or his family. If you haven’t met any of his friends or family members, it’s a giant red flag that he may just be using you. You don’t want to remain a secret forever.
- He decides when you can contact him, which means he has slotted you into a particular segment of his life where he decides how you fit in. If you’re not allowed to initiate contact whenever you like, this is a big problem.
- He never takes you out on a date. If there is no courtship beyond just seducing you or getting into bed with you, that is also a problem. You don’t want to be a placeholder just to meet someone’s physical needs.
- There is no talk of any kind about the future. And if the topic does come up, he is vague about it, never wanting to go into specifics.
At the end of the day, it is for you to decide what you’re willing to put up with and not for the other person to change, they may never change, and then you will have to figure out if you’re willing to play second fiddle your whole life.
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