Singapore employer praised after revealing how much she spends on helper: ‘We buy extra clothes and shoes for her’

SINGAPORE: A Singapore employer has won praise online after sharing the lengths her family goes to support their domestic helper.

In an anonymous post in the SINGAPORE TRANSFER (No Fees/SD), DIRECT HIRE & NEW HELPER group, the woman said that her family covers nearly all of the helper’s daily expenses. This includes “monthly phone bills, EZ-Link card top-ups, toiletries, and personal care products such as shampoo, soap, facial cleanser, deodorant, sanitary pads, toothpaste, toothbrushes, and moisturiser.” The family also pays for her meals whenever they dine outside.

According to the employer, they also regularly get the helper new shoes whenever her old pairs are no longer usable, and buy her extra clothes because “she showers multiple times a day and doesn’t have enough clothes.”

She added that the family even switched to different brands of shampoo and face wash after the helper complained that the original products caused dry hair and irritated skin.

“Last time we bought shampoo and face wash based on our own choice, but she said it made her hair rough and her skin itchy. So we changed to the ones she prefers, and when she asked for conditioner, we bought that too.”

The employer said she initially believed these arrangements were normal for most households employing domestic workers. However, she started questioning it after someone jokingly remarked to her husband, “Wah, like that I also want to be your helper.”

Curious about how other households operate, she asked fellow employers, “What do you usually pay for? What do you let your helper pay for themselves? I’m not trying to calculate every single thing or complain. I’m genuinely curious what the standard practice is.”

“You are kind. Keep it that way.”

In the comments section, netizens applauded the employer for being thoughtful toward her helper’s needs instead of doing only the bare minimum.

One domestic helper wrote, “You’re a rare employer who is nice to her helper. I think because of that your helper will not leave you. Honestly, my employers are not as generous as you, but they are nice to me. It’s rare to have a kind employer these days; most employers are rude…”

Another chimed in, “Toiletries are enough, but the clothes you buy are a bonus for her, especially the EZ-Link. My employer didn’t do this. You are such an angel, madam. Your helper must save more money to give to their family. I hope your helper won’t change her attitude, as you are a very, very kind employer.”

A third added, “Thank you for being kind and generous to your helper.”

Several fellow employers also jumped into the discussion and encouraged the woman not to overthink the comments she received from others.

One employer shared that she actually spends even more on her own helper because she sees her as someone who has contributed greatly to her family’s daily life. She revealed that during holidays and overseas trips, she buys gifts for her helper, such as branded lipstick, handbags, and wallets. She also brings her helper along when travelling around the world with her family.

While her friends and relatives often joked that they also wanted to become her helper after hearing about the benefits, the employer said she never felt embarrassed or guilty about being generous because she believes helpers who work hard and care for the family deserve to be appreciated properly. 

She also told the original poster not to start doubting herself just because others think she is “too nice.”

“Don’t question yourself for being kind. If you start questioning yourself for treating your helper “too well,” that means that it is not genuine. What you give is not too much!” they added.

Another commenter also reassured the employer that there was nothing excessive about buying toiletries based on the helper’s preferences. “You gave her her preferred brand of shampoo and body wash. You are kind. Keep it that way. Don’t listen to others. Keep your helper happy. I’m sure they will work well for you.”

In other news, a man has sparked quite the online debate after sharing that his girlfriend turned down his marriage proposal when he presented what he thought was a sensible, budget-friendly wedding plan: “a simple ROM (Registration of Marriages), no wedding gown, no banquet, and no pricey ring.”

On Monday (Apr 20), he wrote on a local forum that he had laid everything out clearly from the start.

Read more: Girlfriend rejects marriage proposal after man suggests simple ROM with ‘no gown, no banquet, no pricey ring’