SINGAPORE: A man took to social media to share a surprising story about his “successful” friend, who has achieved what many consider the Singaporean dream.
In a post on r/askSingapore, a Reddit forum, he shared that this particular friend of his has checked off all the major milestones: graduating from a prestigious university, landing a high-paying job in the city, owning a brand new SUV, and having a family life.
Yet, despite having it all, his friend confessed during a recent catch-up that he doesn’t feel the happiness or excitement he thought would come with these achievements.
“He said that all of this feels ‘normal’ to him,” he wrote. “Coming from a middle-class background, these are the things I aspire to achieve. It makes me wonder—once someone has accomplished so much, does it no longer bring them joy?”
“He is finding himself walking on the hedonic treadmill.”
In the comments section, Singaporean Redditors pointed out that his friend might be experiencing the hedonic treadmill.
The hedonic treadmill experience is when people achieve their goals and get what they want, but their expectations and desires also tend to increase further. So, even when they hit their targets, the satisfaction doesn’t last long because they quickly start wanting more.
One Redditor said, “He is finding himself walking on the hedonic treadmill.”
Another added, “Same for salary – when you earn 1.8k, you wanted to aim 3.6k (50% increment), then later you want to reach 4k and then higher and higher and higher. At what point does this achievement truly satisfy you and make you happy?”
A third Redditor stated, “If you keep pushing happiness to the next goal, you won’t feel happy forever. The thing you can learn from your friend is that to be happy later, you have to be happy right now.”
Still, others offered alternative explanations for why his friend might have shared those feelings.
One Redditor said, “He’s probably a decent person who downplayed his achievements so as not to appear bragging. Also, I want to highlight that achievements do not measure happiness. OR it could also be a humble bragging.”
Another commented, “He is probably not so happy as his job is stressful and he is trying to reach a higher level. Once tasted something, will keep going for more.”
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