‘How can I find myself a partner?’: 20-something S’porean man says dating’s still ‘pretty tough’ despite six-figure savings, S$4K salary and a car

SINGAPORE: A stable job in the government sector, earning around S$4,000 a month, driving his own car, and sitting comfortably on six-digit savings. This man, in his early 20s, seems to have everything sorted. Everything, except a partner.

In a recent post on the Reddit forum r/sgdatingscene, the man shared that while his life may look picture-perfect on the surface, things are still “pretty tough” for him, as he has not been able to find a partner in Singapore.

He also said that while he did have a girlfriend in the past, they eventually broke up earlier this year because of his work commitments. “My time schedule is quite tight, and I only have some personal time on my weekends,” he wrote.

It also does not help that his workplace is heavily male-dominated. “[My company] has very few females. And the people that I mingle with often tend to be older than me if not they are just out for fun/monetary terms.”

Dating apps, which he turned to in hopes of expanding his options, have not been much better. “Dating apps are kinda stupid, and the people I match don’t really work out well. Older women tend to ask me out, but I date to marry,” he said.

“So how even can I find myself a partner who can settle down with me and try to understand my work schedule? Money isn’t really an issue, but it’s just the people around me,” he added.

“Just do your thing, and the right person or circumstances will come.”

In the discussion thread, one Singaporean Redditor bluntly told him, “You can’t have it all. Simple as that. If you want a partner, then work less and focus on social activities and spend time meeting ladies.”

Another user suggested that he join ‘Meetup social events or sports interest groups to expand his social circle.’

“I was in a similar situation, and they really helped me talk to many more people,” he added. “But, I’ll advise taking things slow and don’t chiong asking for numbers or dates out of them since this is still Singapore.”

Meanwhile, a third commented, “Good that you’re doing well, but you are caught in what society has been telling you to live. Whatever status you are in, find a way to find the joy in it and don’t worry too much about what you don’t have. Many, many people would wish to trade lives with you, so just do your thing, and the right person or circumstances will come.”

In other news, a woman recently opened up online about her complicated feelings after her retired parents began casually mentioning how much they’ve been spending on groceries for her household.

While they’ve repeatedly said they aren’t expecting repayment, the comments have left her feeling awkward and unsure how to respond.

In a post on r/askSingapore, she explained that money was always a major topic growing up. Her dad was extremely careful with spending. Every cent was tracked, and every expense was accounted for.

Read more: Woman shares retired parents keep footing her grocery bill — now she feels ‘awkward’ as they keep bringing it up

Featured image by freepik (for illustration purposes only)