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‘I’m slowly reaching my wits’ end’: Singaporean worker claims she is being bullied by senior colleague

SINGAPORE: Just a year into her first job, a Singaporean worker says she is already at her breaking point after allegedly being bullied by a senior colleague.

In a Reddit post that has since been deleted, the young worker said her “grumpy” colleague, who is in her 40s and has been with the company for about 10 years, frequently undermined her at work. 

The colleague allegedly referred to her as “the boss’ PA” and made remarks such as, “Can you ask the boss on behalf of person A?”

She also claimed that the colleague excluded her from projects that would have contributed to her key performance indicators. 

According to the post, the colleague told her things like, “Eh, you should give that person the job the boss gave,” and, “I’m going to remove your spot for this training because I want to attend.”

The situation worsened when the colleague reportedly took credit for her work. The worker said she was often asked to handle administrative tasks, such as preparing meeting minutes, only for the colleague to forward them to management under her own name. 

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One example she shared was being told, “Can you do all the minutes and send [them] to me? So I can send [it to] the boss.”

Moreover, at a recent seminar, the colleague allegedly demanded that she fill out the necessary forms to obtain the presentation slides so they could later be shared with management.

“They left me in the room alone to do the form and said, ‘It is so easy when the person is here. I don’t have to worry about what to show the boss.’”

Exhausted by what she saw as constant, subtle bullying, the worker vented her frustration online. 

“I think it’s just the strawberry generation in me that I feel so offended. I feel like I have been dealt with a lot, and I’m slowly reaching my wits’ end, especially because she only singles me out.”

“I have always looked up to my colleague and had informed that I want to gain as much as experience as possible. On top of that, give my best.”

“The problem is I depend on her for work as well. I do try my best to learn, but my colleague will never show the way. There are times my colleague will complain when younger generations enter with a similar pay amount and role.”

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At a loss and emotionally drained, the worker turned to fellow netizens for advice. “What should I do?” she asked. “Should I ragebait my colleague? Should I kill my colleague with kindness? Should I let them depend on me and do all the work?”

“Pick your battles wisely.”

In the discussion thread, one Singaporean Redditor suggested that the next time the colleague asks for the minutes, the worker should “send it directly to the boss and just CC her, then act blur when she asks why you didn’t send it to her instead. Or try to find a way out, and after you actually get another job, just expose them during your notice period.”

Another told her, “This usually only happens when they sense competition. In this case, you’re likely a strong contender. So don’t need to do much now.”

“Make sure you’re diligent and meticulous in all your work. Keep a record of everything. There will come a chance that you make a move, and all you need to do is watch her crumbling down. Have fun.”

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A third, however, recommended that she simply try to ignore her colleague’s unruly behaviour to preserve her peace.

“Not sure if you are in the position to negotiate with them or learn to say NO.At the end of the day, bad as you may feel, it’s only a job. After work, enjoy your evening. The best they can do is to ask you to leave. Will it kill you?” they said.

A fourth added, “Pick your battles wisely. Do not take the work personally.”

In other news, a Singaporean man in his late 20s has sparked a lively discussion online after sharing that his parents have been “aggressively pressuring” him to buy a home, even though he is perfectly happy renting.

In a post on a local Reddit forum, the man explained that buying a property has never been high on his list of priorities.

Read more: ‘I don’t see it as an investment’: Singaporean in his late 20s says parents are ‘aggressively pressuring’ him to buy a home despite being happy renting

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