SINGAPORE: A woman recently shared on social media that their domestic helper has frequently been talking to her boyfriend “openly and loudly in the living room” whenever her parents weren’t around.
“Should I be angry/bothered over my domestic helper or should I tell myself to be more understanding?” the woman wrote on r/askSingapore on Saturday (March 30).
Furthermore, the woman detailed several other issues troubling her lately regarding the helper’s conduct.
These include the helper’s frequent use of her phone between tasks, which results in disruptions and delays in completing them, her tendency to take late-night showers, typically around 11 or 12 pm, and watching dramas and making TikTok videos in her spare time.
Additionally, the employer observed that the helper wore “big earrings” and had manicured nails. These observations made her suspect these activities might be linked to the helper’s relationship.
Seeking validation and advice, the woman turned to other Singaporeans in the online forum to inquire if her concerns were valid.
“Maid are human beings. Not your slave”
The woman received a lot of criticism from Singaporean Redditors for being overly concerned with the lifestyle of their domestic helper. Some even speculated that her concerns might stem from jealousy over the helper’s relationship.
Also, some Redditors suggested that if the situation bothered her, she could report it to her parents.
One Redditor advised, “Report your observations to your parents and leave them to make the call. Maybe they want her to be 100% focused, no phone time.
Maybe they are okay with her using the phone as long as work gets done by the time it needs to. They probably also have more authority to tell her to change compared to you.”
Regarding the helper’s appearance and personal activities, the Redditors pointed out that it was her personal time and choice of entertainment and that the woman didn’t have a say in these matters.
One Redditor stated, “Maid are human beings. Not your slave. They are allowed to have boyfriends and wear earrings and do their nails. Treat them like humans. Don’t be jealous. If the house is clean and the food is good don’t complain.”
While another chimed in to say, “Does this affect her work or safety? If no then let her be. She’s not a slave.”
Others, meanwhile, stated that it was reasonable for the woman to feel bothered by their helper’s behavior since it interfered with her duties and disrupted the household environment.
One Redditor commented, “Your parents as the employer should know that she has a bf. The liability is on them if she gets pregnant etc or whatever shit that she does outside of the house.
If you employ someone for a job, so long as they get it done, i don’t care if they use their phone. If it is affecting her work, then your parents will need to talk to her.”
Another Redditor who also had a helper shared their rules in the discussion thread, saying, “We keep our helper’s phone from 6am to 6pm. Afterwards, we’ll return the phone and she can do whatever she wants, as its her rest period.
There are some exceptions to this rule ofcourse. When both me and my spouse is not at home or when shes outside the home, for groceries or other misc things.
Emergency times when she needs to contact her family or agency. During off days, we’ll definitely give her phone back as well.
This is mainly to enforce her to focus 100% towards our newborn.”
Read related: Employer complains that their “helper washes cleaning cloth with my laundry clothes again and again”