Wife says her husband no longer finds her attractive, so she wants “to lose 20-30kg” but then, she can’t lose the weight

SINGAPORE: Recently, a woman admitted online that she planned to lose as much as 20–30kg of weight so her husband would find her attractive again.

She shared her story on the r/SingaporeRaw forum, expressing concern that, despite being married for only 11 months, she feels like their marriage is already falling apart, mostly because of her weight. She also explained how she came to this realization.

“Recently, I stumbled upon a text with him and his army friends. His friend said, ‘Didn’t you say you are not attracted to your wife anymore? Maybe you can go ahead and try * Referring to getting in contact with other girls *, My husband replied, ‘My wife will kill me’.”

After reading the conversation, the woman said she felt extremely hurt and wanted to “stop eating” altogether.

Furthermore, she stated that she has always been plump, even as a child, and that “losing weight” has always been one of her challenges. 

“I have tried everything from dieting, running, weight training, pills, etc. to lose weight, but I just can’t,” she wrote.

Feeling like she’s reached her breaking point, she turned to the online community for help, seeking advice on how to lose weight quickly and effectively.

“I need advice. If he still finds me unattractive afterwards….. there is only so much I can do,” she said.

“You deserve someone who loves you as you are and not for your outer appearance.”

Instead of offering weight loss advice, several Singaporean Redditors focused on critiquing the husband’s behaviour for discussing his wife’s weight behind her back.

They pointed out that if the husband genuinely cared about her health and well-being, he would be more supportive and involved in her journey to better health rather than discussing it with his friends.

One Redditor said, “I don’t know any guys that will talk like this about their wives and I can guarantee you that if they did, they’d be looked down on.

You should lose weight if you want to, but staying in a relationship like this will damage your own self esteem and confidence. Find someone more mature while you’re still young, or be prepared to settle for a life of gaslighting and lying.

Choice is yours.”

Another commented, “Seems like you married a superficial man who only goes for looks, instead of a man with depth.” However, some said that if she’s keen on losing weight, she should do it for herself and not her husband. 

On this note, many advised her to cut down on sugary drinks and salty food, lessen her intake of high-fat and high-calorie foods, avoid eating snacks, eat more vegetables and protein, drink 1.5 litres of water and exercise daily.

One Redditor added, “Sleep at 10pm and wake up 6 or 6.30 to exercise. If you stay up late, it will affect your metabolism and will disrupt your exercise routines.”

Another chimed in, writing, “Every time you eat, you should start with veg or fibre, followed by the meats and then a few portions of rice/or the main carb. 

This will help reduce the amount and the rate of carbs absorption and blood sugar spike. In case you ever eat dessert, never eat it before the main meal.”

Read also: Woman who gained 20kg due to working stress in Singapore asks if she should quit her job “to lose weight”

Featured image by Depositphotos