Marriages don’t just end overnight there are a series of events that makes the relationship erode over time. Relationship experts talk about some of the signs to watch out for:
- An eerily quite household
No laughter, no chatter and just quietness in general is not a good sign at all. Conversations are cursory and there is no deep conversation other than things like who is going to take out the garbage or do some other basic chores.
- Most of the communication is sarcastic or results in arguments
Author of Love that Works: A Guide to Enduring Intimacy, loveologist and sex educator, Wendy Strgar says, “You’re living in a land mine where the heart connection that keeps relationships safe has eroded and no one is expressing themselves except through indirect, passive-aggressive comments.”
- You think about other people and not just a little bit
If you spend a lot of time thinking about other people it’s quite probable that your emotional needs are not being met. Marriage counselor and relationship coach Samantha Burns says, “You might think you’re just looking but this is a breach of trust and security in your relationship, even if you don’t message or go out with anyone. In an at-risk marriage you look outside of the relationship to feel attractive, desired or to feel like you matter.”
- You hardly touch each other
Happy couples tend to hold hands more, lean against each other and less of this is not a good sign at all. Strgar says that generally when a marriage has no genuine relationship to hold to, the idea of sex is also unappealing. “If either of you is saying no to sex perpetually, you need to look deeper at what is really going on,” says Strgar.
- You would rather spend time with your friends than your significant other
If you rather go out with your friends and have stopped enjoying leisure time with your partner that’s not a good thing either. The same applies if your primary mode of communication is via text, it signals drifting.
Burns say having a ‘we’ mindset instead of a ‘me’ mindset is important in a relationship. So if any of the above is already happening, take action or it might just be too late.
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