Man grows worried as 26 y/o GF quits job and spends most days gaming at home: ‘Is there a future with my current GF?’

SINGAPORE: A man is growing increasingly worried about his 26-year-old girlfriend after she quit her admin job several months ago and now spends most of her days at home playing computer games.

The man took to Reddit for advice, saying he is concerned about the direction her life is taking, especially as they have been together for around a year and he has started thinking about their future as a couple.

According to his post, his girlfriend dropped out of polytechnic and currently has only an O-level certificate. When they first met, she was working in an admin role, and he said he was perfectly happy with that.

Since leaving the job, however, she has been unemployed for several months and appears to have settled into a rather unusual routine.

“The way she spends her time now is waking up in the late afternoon (usually 5 pm or later) to play computer games while only going to bed in the early morning.”

The man said neither he nor her family knows whether she is actually looking for another job.

“She seems to be unserious about it and constantly brushes everyone off or gets angry at me for bringing it up,” he wrote.

“It almost seems like she thinks that her state of employment has nothing to do with me even though I’m her boyfriend who is thinking about our future together.”

He added that he had tried encouraging her to further her education, but she repeatedly rejected the idea, giving various reasons, including not wanting to put herself through the stress of being a student again.

Feeling like he had reached a dead end, he turned to the online community for advice: “Is there a future with my current GF? Is there something I can still do? I feel like I tried everything. We’ve been together for about a year now.”

‘Are you willing to provide for her?’

In the discussion thread, one Singaporean Redditor said that his girlfriend may be suffering from depression.

“Is she showering? If not, she may be having a depression. You need to take her to see a psychiatrist before you can shame or break up with her. That’s the most human thing you can do to help her.”

Another Redditor encouraged the boyfriend to sit down with her and have a proper conversation about what she was going through. 

“Maybe have a serious talk with her, bah. Don’t only ask her what she wants to do or whether she is looking for a job. The answer might not be what you want to hear, but try to understand where she is coming from first instead of judging her.” 

“Then tell her what is worrying you. The issue isn’t only that she is unemployed or spending most of the day gaming. You’re thinking about a future together, so you need to know whether both of you have compatible expectations about work, finances, responsibilities, and life in general.”

A third Redditor, meanwhile, said the boyfriend might want to look beyond the present and ask himself whether he’d be willing to support her financially if she decided not to work.

“Are you willing to provide for her? I got a colleague, and his wife studied so much and went into university, but she only worked for a few months, and then after she married, she didn’t want to work anymore. So, studying more doesn’t necessarily mean she will work in the future.”

In other news, an American earning US$220,000 a year is considering taking a significant pay cut to move to Singapore because he believes the trade-off could give him something money cannot easily buy: a better quality of life.

The man recently shared on Reddit’s r/askSingapore that he’s contemplating accepting a job offer in Singapore worth roughly US$150,000, or around S$200,000 a year.

Read more: ‘What’s the point of maximising my salary?’ American considers US$70k pay cut to move to Singapore