Is filial piety ever enough? Comic strip on ‘Why I gave up on my mother’ goes viral

SINGAPORE: A recent comic strip about the limits of filial piety from The Woke Salaryman has garnered significant attention online, not just from Singaporeans but also from other Asians. This should come as no surprise, given that respect and reverence for elders is one of the key values in this part of the world.

Captioned “Is filial piety ever enough?” and based on a person’s real-life experiences, the comic strip is about the relationship between a woman and her mother, who, although she was capable of being affectionate at times, also had a dark side that caused her to mistreat her daughter.

For example, her mum threw a phone at her when she behaved naughtily when she was seven years old, although she claimed it was an accident, and when she was 15, her mum kicked her out in the middle of the night.

When she started working, her mum made her give her half of her salary, as well as pay for all their utility bills and mortgage payments, which meant the woman had very little to show for it after working for 10 years.

One day, after a particularly difficult fight between them, the woman finally left their home. When she realized how badly her mother had been treating her, continuing to harass her even at work, she filed a Personal Protection Order.

Although she built a new life for herself, she said she still loves her mum and tries to understand why she treated her so badly. However, she wrote that she can’t forgive her mother quite yet.

“Am I unfilial? Depending on who you ask, the answer might be yes. I grew up in a society where filial piety was seen as a virtue,” she wrote, adding that while this used to bother her, she has come to realize that relationships are a two-way street.

“Mak, maybe I am a bad daughter like you always said, but I’d rather be a bad daughter for now if it means I can get my life back at the end,” she wrote.

The post has since been viewed, liked, and shared on Facebook and Instagram thousands of times, and netizens have not held back on commenting as well, suggesting that the strip has struck a chord with so many.

“Thanks for this. Seen too many people passing empty platitudes of ‘you only have 1 mother/father’ when they should be feeling gratitude that their parents are good,” wrote a Facebook user.

“I feel this.. no matter how hard I try to satisfy my mom, to give in to all of her demands — it is still not enough. My dad knows this, even my close relatives too — but all they can say is ‘sabarlah’ (be patient)…

When I had my daughter, I swore that she would never experience all those gaslighting,” a woman chimed in.

“You cannot love and hug a roll of barbed wire,” another commented.

The Independent Singapore has reached out to The Woke Salaryman for further comments. /TISG

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