Singapore — A woman fretting about the growing financial gap between her and her boyfriend poured out her woes on the Internet.
In an anonymous post to the popular confessions Facebook page NUSWhispers on Friday, she reveals that both are in their early 30s and had been dating for 11 months. They are financially independent and are in about the same income bracket, she said. But it has begun to bother her that her boyfriend is much more ‘frugal’ than she is.
It didn’t matter at first, she said, but “recently I felt that he isn’t putting in as much effort as I am and it feels like he is becoming a gold digger”.
That dissatisfaction escalated on Valentines’ Day (doesn’t everything) into a fight when he cancelled their dinner plans at the last minute so that he could console a heartbroken friend.
But then they decided to celebrate their love on Feb 15 instead.
“Obviously on Vday there should be effort put in from both sides no? I bought him a shirt and necktie from a high-end brand. But guess what he bought me? Just a few normal chocolates and 1 stalk of flower”, she wrote.
She didn’t expect anything expensive, but she had expected more effort and a better gift from her boyfriend. She qualified that by saying that they had both agreed on S$100 budget for the occasion.
Clearly frustrated, she highlighted other occasions when she deemed him to be too frugal. For the previous Christmas, she bought him an expensive gaming chair.
“2 weeks before Christmas, he accidentally went into my inbox and saw the order confirmation mail so he already knew I bought the chair for him. In return he gave me a pair of Nike sneakers”, she wrote.
She says that when she would go over to his place, she would always buy food and dessert for his family but he would have bought at most only two or three packets of food when they had New Year’s Eve dinner at her home.
When she confronted him, “he brushed it off by saying he was brought up to be frugal, cannot change one. When I asked him if I should lower the price of my gifts to him to match his, he said No, he rather receive expensive gifts than cheap ones that he will not want or use”.
She loves him, she says, but feels that her partner isn’t willing to put in the effort and just wants to receive gifts.
“But it can’t be only one party giving in a relationship right. I also cannnot understand why is his friend more important than me on Vday. I don’t feel loved by him anymore. What should I do?” she asked.
/TISG