‘I may never get a job again’: Singaporean shares emotional toll of six-month job search

SINGAPORE: For many people, the hardest part of job hunting isn’t just finding the right opportunity. It’s staying hopeful when the search takes longer than expected.

Recently, a downcast, unemployed Singaporean took to Reddit to ask locals how he could possibly “stay mentally strong” during his job hunt.

In his post, he explained that he was laid off around six months ago. At the start, he said he was genuinely optimistic, applying for 10 to 20 jobs every day while tailoring his resume.

He felt hopeful and was convinced he would land a job soon.

Unfortunately, the opposite happened. He went through multiple rounds of interviews that “ended in complete silence” and received rejection after rejection until his spirit finally broke.

“I know rejection is part of the process, but after enough of it, it gets hard not to start questioning yourself, and right now, I can’t help but feel like I may never get a job again,” he said. “I’m finding it even harder to open job portals or my email because I associate them with disappointment.”

Hoping to find a sliver of hope, he asked those who had gone through a long job search how they coped with the mental side of things.

“What helped you stay positive when it feels like your applications are just going into the abyss? I’d really appreciate hearing your experiences or any advice that got you through it.”

“Don’t lose hope! Good things will happen ultimately!”

Kind and encouraging responses quickly poured in, with one user sharing that she had gone through the same ordeal.

She wrote, “I went through the same cycle of sending out applications, being very anxious for callbacks or interviews, took me about 3 months..”

“I’d say it helps to have a daily routine to take your mind off the anxiety that comes with job hunting, and having savings to tide you over. Be positive, it really is a matter of time before everyone gets hired- because every company needs roles to be filled.”

Another user, whose job hunting took 10 months, said, “I feel you. I was previously retrenched and took me 10 months to find another job. Initially I was also hopeful and took my time to slowly apply for roles that aligned 100% to my long term career goal and I was very picky. Don’t lose hope! Good things will happen ultimately!”

A third shared the advice he got from a helpful auntie, writing, “I don’t have the winning recipe but I went to the e2i at Jurong East. I am lucky to have met a good auntie officer whom view my 3 pages resume and corrected me. Basically, she said that to bring forward the relevant past experiences to the front of the pages like a cover letter. I followed, and got a job two months later.”

Others suggested that the post author start doing some part-time jobs to take his mind off things, lower his salary expectations, widen his job search/pivot from his role, start doing his hobbies, or approach a career coach.

One said, “Go look for a career coach. They could offer advice and help where one could have missed out.”

Another chimed in, “Laid off previously and took 5 months to find a job. It was a very difficult period to not feel like you’re wasting your life everyday. I don’t have a miracle solution for you other than to tell you you’re not alone in feeling this way.”

Taking care of one’s mental health during dark times

For those experiencing job search anxiety or depression, career and medical experts advise creating a structured daily routine to restore a sense of normalcy and control. They also recommend setting realistic goals, such as submitting five job applications and reaching out to two contacts each day, while celebrating small wins along the way.

Experts also encourage job seekers to look after their physical health by exercising regularly or engaging in sports and hobbies, while protecting their mental well-being by avoiding negative self-talk. If the emotional toll becomes overwhelming, they recommend seeking support from a mental health professional.

Read also: Singaporean earning S$9.5k considers taking a 50% pay cut for better work-life balance