Broke uni student says dating costs in SG caught him off guard, wonders if he should tell his GF about his financial struggles

SINGAPORE: A broke university student recently shared on social media that he had underestimated just how expensive dating can be in Singapore.

Sharing his dilemma in a post on r/SGexams, the student explained that while his relationship has been going well in most aspects, managing the financial side of dating has become unexpectedly stressful. He confessed that he hadn’t anticipated how quickly expenses could pile up, from paying for meals and drinks during casual outings to covering little extras like snacks, transport, or small gifts. 

“When going out on dates, I [usually] pay for her food etc,” he wrote. “She does pay for my food at times too and gets me gifts, but I’m not sure if this is financially sustainable for me in the long run, as I don’t have much savings either + past poor financial decisions.”

The student went on to ask the Reddit community for advice. “Is the simplest decision just to inform her about my financial situation, even if it’s super embarrassing? I’m well aware of my mistake of seeming to be financially stable. Or should I go find a part-time job/gig jobs? For those who are also in university and have a partner, how do y’all manage?

“You should be truthful and honest to her.”

In the comments, many people advised the student to come clean to his girlfriend about his financial struggles.

One wrote, “As a girl, I’d rather my partner let me know about his financial situation so that we can sit down and have a chat and compromise rather than have him end the relationship with me because he’s unable to keep up with the expenses. Dates don’t have to be expensive. ”

Another shared, “From my own experience, after 2-3 dates, I had come clean to my gf about my negative financial balance (debt). She accepted it and from that point on we chose cheap places or DIY most of the time. We we got married, and even after we got married, we were poor the first few years but managed to save up after that. That was 20 years ago.”

“If a girl is willing to go through with you when you are poor, she is more likely to stay with you when facing challenges in life, which is a sure thing that will happen from time to time.”

A third echoed this sentiment, writing, “You should be truthful and honest to her. Relationships thrive on trust and open communication. If she really love you for who you are, she would understand; if not, you would save both of your time.”

A fourth advised, “Show some backbone and get a part time job, its not that deep. Clearly she’s there for you and not your money so time to man up and reciprocate.”

In other news, a jobseeker’s Reddit post describing a “suspicious” job offer from an small- and medium-sized enterprise (SME) has sparked discussion online after she revealed that a potential employer planned to split her salary across two separate companies, allegedly for quota purposes.

Posting on the r/askSingapore forum to seek advice, she asked, “How common is this? Has anyone else encountered this before, and will it affect my future job?”

Read more: Jobseeker raises concerns after being told salary would be split between two companies, asks, ‘How common is this?’