SINGAPORE: A woman in her late 20s took to social media to confess that she’s beginning to feel “unsure” about her relationship after her boyfriend started asking her to cover his monthly debt repayments of S$1,500, along with providing him money for his daily expenses.
Posting her story on the r/singaporejobs subreddit on Friday (Oct 31), the woman explained that she earns around S$4,600 a month and used to spend about S$1,800 on her own needs, setting aside the rest as savings.
However, things changed drastically when she found out that her boyfriend had secretly accumulated a huge gambling debt, which completely wiped out his savings.
“He has to pay about S$1.5k a month for his debts for close to a year, and because he currently has no income or savings, I’ve been covering his monthly debt payments and giving him money for daily expenses,” she said.
“But it’s starting to affect me mentally because I’ve had to cut back on my own spending just to help him. I’ve only been spending around S$500 [per month].”
The woman further shared that her boyfriend used to have a S$2,500-paying job months ago. Unfortunately, he resigned to try out a commission-based sales role that came with no basic salary.
She went on to say that while her boyfriend has assured her “he has stopped gambling,” she still feels uneasy about their future together.
“I want to believe him, but I can’t help feeling worried about the future. He has no savings, no insurance, and I’m not sure how sustainable this is. I also don’t know if I’m being supportive or just setting myself up for more stress later.”
Seeking help from the online community, she wrote at the end of her post, “I’d really appreciate some honest advice—am I overthinking this, or is this a real red flag for the long term?”
“Does he have no parents, no relatives?”
In the discussion thread, many users bluntly told the woman that her boyfriend is a complete “red flag” and urged her to leave the relationship.
One pointed out, “Any guy who can take his partner’s money to settle his debts… red flag. Serious red flags—if not on his character, then on his judgment. Where are his parents and siblings in this?”
Another advised, “Dump him now; you are still young enough to find another boyfriend. Gambling types are not husband material.”
A third, meanwhile, suggested that she start asking herself the following questions: “Why are you paying for his debt? Does he have no parents, no relatives? Then what happens when y’all need to buy a house? Can you tank all?”
A fourth added, “When you’re starting to get worried about money, then just tell him that money is important to you. This is one of the reasons why relationships fail. Money, money, money… In Singapore, money is more important than everything, and you know this already. You live in a place where this is the single topic that everyone talks about everywhere here.”
In other news, a frustrated fresh grad took to social media to rant that after breaking his back to land a “prestigious” job at one of the Big Four firms, he ended up dealing with bosses who seemed more obsessed with his outfit choices than the actual work he was doing.
In an anonymous confession on the NUSWhispers Facebook page on Friday (Oct 31), the fresh grad said his bosses, whom he described as “toxic as hell”, had reprimanded him for wearing a plain T-shirt on a Friday, even though there were no client meetings or important events scheduled.
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