MALAYSIA: In any relationship, communication and consideration are crucial in ensuring that both partners feel respected and valued. When plans are made, it is expected that both parties will be kept informed of any changes, especially when those changes affect safety and well-being.
A Malaysian woman recently shared on Reddit her frustration after her boyfriend didn’t bother to update her, leaving her stranded alone at 1 am after a late-night outing. His lack of planning and consideration sparked an online debate about respect, responsibility, and relationship safety.
What happened: A night of miscommunication
The woman explained that her boyfriend had invited her out for moreh (a late-night meal after terawih prayers) and promised to pick her up early. However, without informing her, he delayed the pick-up until 11.30 pm. Although she was upset by the last-minute change, she chose to overlook it just to spend time with him.
Later that night, at 1 am, he suddenly told her that he needed to return to campus immediately due to his IPTA curfew. This was another detail that he had failed to mention earlier. Caught off guard, she was left with no choice. Instead of ensuring she got home safely, her boyfriend dropped her off on the road and told her to take a Grab home alone.
The woman expressed frustration not just at the lack of communication, but also at the lack of concern for her safety. She admitted that she was unaware of IPTA curfews and felt that he should have been upfront about his time constraints.
The bigger issue: Safety and responsibility in relationships
The incident raised concerns about safety, with many pointing out the risks of being left alone on the road late at night. Taking a ride home alone at such an hour can be dangerous, especially for women. If you invite someone out that late, it’s only fair to ensure they get home safely.
While having a curfew is understandable, waiting until the last minute to mention it shows a lack of responsibility. A little planning could have saved her the stress and danger of finding her own way home at that hour.
Reddit reactions: Netizens weigh in on the situation
Many netizens were outraged, calling the boyfriend immature and careless. One commenter bluntly stated, “This shows that he is someone who doesn’t plan and doesn’t care about others.” Others echoed this sentiment, arguing that a responsible partner would prioritise safety and respect.
Another netizen pointed out that a man who invites a woman out should take responsibility and make sure she gets home safely. “You should be angry. That is not how you treat someone else’s daughter. If he picks you up, he has to send you home. That’s like an unspoken rule. Safe to say your ex-boyfriend—sorry, your boyfriend—is still a boy.”
The biggest concern among commenters was the lack of regard for safety. One user was appalled, writing, “Girl, how about your safety? That is so dangerous!” Others pointed out that the boyfriend seemed to care more about his curfew than her well-being, with one stating, “He left you on the road. That’s dangerous. Like, he cares more about his curfew than your safety.”
Most advised the woman to confront him about his behaviour and make it clear that such treatment is unacceptable.
Why mutual respect is key in relationships
A healthy relationship is built on mutual respect, care, and responsibility. When one partner fails to consider the other’s safety, it can lead to frustration and distrust. In this case, the boyfriend not only put her at risk but also showed little regard for her time and well-being.
While everyone makes mistakes, it is essential to acknowledge and correct them. A simple act of planning ahead and ensuring a safe trip home could have prevented this entire situation. Moving forward, both partners need to establish clear expectations and open communication to avoid similar incidents in the future.
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Featured image by Freepik (for illustration purposes only)