SINGAPORE: A young woman shared on a Reddit forum that she felt rather ‘ashamed’ when she realized her boyfriend was far too rich for someone of her social standing.
Sharing her story on r/SGexams on Saturday (Oct 12), she explained that while she always knew her boyfriend came from a well-off family, it wasn’t until they’d been together for a year that she realized how wealthy the family were.
It turned out that his family lives in a landed property, drives luxury cars, and regularly eats at places like Marina Bay Sands and Resorts World Sentosa—places she’s never been to.
In contrast, she comes from a more modest background, living in an HDB flat with her family, where her dad, the sole breadwinner, makes under S$5,000 a month.
“When we go on dates, he pays for nearly every meal, and every gift from him is the most expensive item I own. Most of the things I buy are second-hand, while he doesn’t know what the ‘Carousell’ app is,” she said.
“He knows I feel embarrassed, but he always assures me and says it’s ‘okay’ or ‘cute.’ I do manage my savings, and I buy him things like shoes occasionally, even if it means I eat Maggi for the next few weeks,” she added.
She also confessed that she’s nervous about meeting his parents, fearing they’ll judge her for her financial background—or worse, offer her money to leave him like something straight out of a K-drama.
She’s even worried people might think she’s a gold digger because of how much wealthier he is.
“I frequently feel like I’m not good enough for him or unsuitable to be his future wife. Will people assume that I’m a gold digger, too?” she asked. “I can’t help but feel he is way out of my league.”
“A relationship is not just about money.”
In the discussion thread, several Singaporean Redditors encouraged her to communicate openly with her boyfriend about her insecurities and to remember that love isn’t determined by financial status.
They also advised her to focus on the qualities that brought them together rather than letting financial differences overshadow their relationship.
One Redditor commented, “Money isn’t everything. Don’t put yourself down and feel unworthy just because of the circumstances and the cards you were dealt that you never had a choice in.
Enjoy your time together, grow as people and individuals, and take things as they come. Best wishes; don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow has enough worries of its own.”
Another echoed this sentiment and said, “A relationship is not just about money. Someone that rich would look for someone who can help him stay rich and push him to be the best version of himself, and vice versa.
Be that person. Be the one who makes him happy. Be supportive in good times and bad. Be the one who makes him love life. You don’t need money to do all this for him.”
Other Redditors also suggested that she work on insecurities so she could fully embrace her relationship.
One Redditor asked, “Why would you feel ashamed for being middle class? More importantly, even if you were born into a poor family, what is there to be ashamed of?
I find your perspective highly problematic. It’s quite deplorable to tie people’s worth to their socio-economic status, even more so to one they were born into.”
Another remarked, “Focus on the relationship and being a good girlfriend to him. Stop obsessing because you might destroy what is already a good thing.”