‘What to do? Please help’ — Employer frustrated after learning maid spends 80% of her time on social media

SINGAPORE: A local employer recently took to social media to express her frustration after discovering that her domestic helper had been spending most of her time on social media instead of fulfilling her duties at home.

Posting anonymously in the Facebook group “Direct Hire Transfer Singapore Maid/Domestic Helper” on Tuesday (July 29), the woman shared that she had reviewed footage from her home’s CCTV system and was shocked by what she saw. 

According to her, the helper had been “neglecting” her two young children and spent about 80% of her time recording TikTok dance videos and going live on Instagram.

Disturbed by the findings, the employer decided to check the helper’s public social media accounts—and what she found raised more red flags.

“She has hundreds of followers and receives a lot of comments on her TikTok, and she replies to them in a very flirtatious manner,” the employer wrote. “But during the interview, she came across as humble and down-to-earth.”

The employer added that she is now unsure whether to keep the helper, as some of her stories do not seem to add up.

For example, the helper previously told her that she was “happily married” and had three children back in her home country. However, based on her social media posts, it appeared that she was in a relationship with a foreign worker in Singapore.

In another instance, the helper claimed during the interview that her previous contract with an American family ended because they relocated to another country. 

But later, when the employer asked for more details, the helper admitted that her contract was actually terminated because she had brought a man into the house while her employers were away.

To make things worse, the helper also lied about her domestic skills.

“She doesn’t know how to keep the house tidy. I have two young kids, and they will leave toys all over the house. I still need to tell her; only then will she do it, and if she does do it, she’ll just throw everything in a container. Not even keeping it nicely,” the employer explained.

“She also doesn’t know how to cook, even though she claimed she could during the interview. When we brought her to the supermarket and asked her what she can cook so we can buy the ingredients. She said she can only cook basic instant noodles and eggs. Omg.”

Despite the numerous issues, the employer admitted she was reluctant to terminate the helper’s contract, as the family had already paid for her “flight, medical check-up, and insurance.”

“I also urgently need someone to care for my baby since both my husband and I are working full-time,” she added. “What should I do? Please help.”

“I have experienced this; it will not get any better but worse.”

In the comments, many netizens strongly urged the employer to terminate the helper’s contract, stressing that her behaviour was unprofessional and posed a potential risk to the safety of the children.

“Your baby should always be a priority in any situation. She doesn’t seem like a trustworthy person from what you are saying. I would never leave my kids with someone like that because she won’t have accountability if anything happens to your kids,” one wrote.

“This type of helper does not know work etiquette. I am also a helper, and I can’t tolerate such behaviour. You can either give her a few months or send her home and get her blocklisted; maybe she can learn a lesson from it,” another wrote.

“Send back now and get a new helper. I have experienced this; it will not get any better but worse,” a third commented.

Some also suggested the employer take time off work or get help from family members like parents or in-laws while looking for a replacement.

Still, despite the overwhelming criticism, a few commenters felt the employer should give her a chance and hear “her side” of the story. One added, “People do change over time, as my maid has also changed a lot since she started working with us.”

Establish clear rules for phone use

Ms K Jayaprema, president of the Association of Employment Agencies (Singapore), says it is important for employers to have an open discussion with their domestic helpers about phone use and to come up with a reasonable schedule.

She also recommends setting basic house rules, such as asking the helper to keep her phone off during working hours unless she is expecting an urgent call. Employers may also suggest avoiding phone use past bedtime.

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