SINGAPORE: Childhood experiences play a powerful role in shaping adults’ relationship with money, influencing everything from spending habits to financial anxieties. Highlighting this, an online user took to a forum on Monday (March 31) to ask Singaporeans who grew up poor how their attitudes towards money changed after they achieved financial success.
“Those who grew up poor but are doing well now, how did your relationship with money change?” This was the question the writer asked Singaporeans, sharing that as an adult, he finds it relievingnot tot have to check his bank account balance whenever he walks into a shop.
A handful of Singaporeans answered the call and shared examples of how growing up poor has affected their relationship with money as adults. “Work hard and work harder. I grew up sleeping outside the living room and now own my own house,” said one.
Another shared, “Quite a bit of ‘revenge spending’ and pretty poor financial habits overall. I spend a lot pampering my inner child who had little growing up, a lot on vanity (even as a guy), a lot on charity, and a lot of fixing issues (teeth, therapy, etc) from having grown up in a broken home with great financial difficulties.”
How growing up poor can affect your relationship with money as an adult
According to Therapy Cincinnati, growing up accustomed to financial struggles can have a significant impact on your financial mentality as an adult. Oftentimes, children worried about how their families would manage to pay bills and cover expenses grow into adults who feel anxious about money. This can lead them to feel stress and pressure about finances, and affect their ability to enjoy life. Growing up poor can also affect one’s view of themselves, which is why some adults who grew up around financial struggle tend to have low self-esteem.
Growing up in poverty can also affect an adult’s ability to form healthy relationships. Furthermore, the instability of growing up in a poor household can foster a deep sense of being afraid to fail, from worrying about making mistakes to anxiety over the thought of possibly not succeeding. This kind of mindset may make adults less likely to take risks and go after their dreams, limiting their chances of success.
Financial struggles during childhood and a lack of control as adults
For many adults, growing up poor can be the invisible driving force causing them to become overworked. Having a poor childhood can also lead to people adopting a scarcity mindset, where adults become too careful and scared to spend, out of the fear that they are depleting their financial resources. However, it is important to note that it is possible to shift your mindset to one of abundance, which will allow you the space and freedom to feel more secure while making decisions concerning money.
Additionally, a study by the American Psychological Association found that growing up in poverty can significantly impact an individual’s sense of control in adulthood, often leading to increased impulsivity.
Changing the narrative a key to a healthier relationship with money
While growing up with financial struggles can shape your mindset around money, it’s empowering to realise that you have the ability to change your response to past experiences. For instance, financial hardship in childhood can foster resilience and resourcefulness. While the past cannot be changed, you can reframe your narrative and challenge limiting beliefs—whether through self-reflection or seeking professional support—to build a healthier relationship with money.
See also: ‘Is it wrong to only want to date and marry a woman who matches or exceeds my income?’ 28yo man asks
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