Jobless daughter who gives her mum S$1.9K/month from her savings says her mum still tells her, “You don’t give me enough”

SINGAPORE: A woman took to Reddit to share that her 78-year-old mum still complains despite receiving S$1,900 from her every month.

In her post on r/askSingapore, the woman explained that in addition to the S$1,900, she gives her mum each month to cover expenses like home broadband, the helper’s salary, electricity bills, and her insurance premium; her mum also receives financial support from her two siblings.

“She spends money on household stuff for my dad (84) and helper. She gets more allowance from my other siblings. I’m not sure why she is always asking for more,” she wrote.

“She is constantly saying I do not give her enough and even came to ask for a share of my bonus, which I don’t have because I am jobless, but I continue to give her money every month out of my savings.”

She also mentioned that her mum “hurled insults” at her when she told her she didn’t have a job that paid a bonus for the new year.

“It is very offputting, and sadly, I learned from her that money destroys relationships (the lack of or perceived lack of),” she lamented.

Perplexed by the situation, the woman turned to the Reddit community to ask about the norms in such scenarios: “If you are a single child, do you give more? If you have siblings, would you give a little less? Do your parents come after you for more money?”

“S$1.9K is certainly not the norm…”

Many users felt that $1,900 a month was way above the norm and encouraged her to think about her own financial security, especially since she’s currently jobless and relying on her savings.

One Redditor asked her, “How old is your mum? S$1.9K for a retiree should be more than sufficient; some more, you have two other siblings. I suggest you ask her why $1.9K is not enough. Is she spending on something that she shouldn’t?”

Another remarked, “Jeez, S$1.9k before adding the other siblings? What are your parents spending on? Buying a new house?”

A third Redditor said, “I feel this is a case of the poor making their future family line poorer. That’s probably also one reason why the rich are getting richer.

What a sad position to be in without a job and having the parent still hounding you for money you don’t already have.”

How much do Singaporeans give their parents each month?

In 2023, The Straits Times surveyed 1,000 Singaporeans and found that around 75% provide their parents with a monthly allowance.

Of those who do, nearly half contribute between $300 and $500 a month, while others give around 10% to 20% of their salary.

Read more: 29 yo man with $500K savings considers moving out due to bad blood with parents

Featured image by Depositphotos (for illustration purposes only)