‘I felt like a meal ticket’: Singaporean man says catfishing is ‘too common now’ after disappointing date

SINGAPORE: A man shared his frustration online after yet another experience with catfishing on a dating app, saying the woman he met looked completely different from her photos and also behaved in a way that left him feeling like he had been treated as a “meal ticket.”

On Wednesday (April 8), he wrote on the r/sgdatingscene subreddit that he had been chatting with the woman for about a week before they agreed to meet. 

However, when they finally saw each other in person, he realised she looked nothing like the images she had used online. 

The man said she was a “5/10” in real life, and while he initially brushed it off since he felt he had grown somewhat used to being catfished, it was her attitude that surprised him even more.

“What bothered me more was how she carried herself in person,” he wrote. 

“She was always friendly and enthusiastic on text, but didn’t smile when we greeted each other, no expression, and honestly lacked basic conversational skills. I brought it up respectfully, and she admitted she might still be in work mode.”

The man added that she also seemed to lack basic manners. “She didn’t thank me for making the restaurant reservation, didn’t thank the waiter who brought the food, and didn’t thank me after we got drinks.” 

“I planned everything and paid for everything without saying a thing, but her sense of entitlement was pretty noticeable.”

The man also pointed out several red flags that he noticed even before they met. He said he had asked her directly if she was seeing someone else, but she avoided giving a clear answer and only stated that “she was single.” 

She also reportedly sent a “long list of dating requirements,” about 200 words, generated with AI.

Moreover, when he suggested meeting on a weekend, she declined and told him she preferred “weekday dinners” and claimed she had a trip planned for those days.

But during their date, he realised that this might not have been true. 

According to him, she did not seem to remember anything about the supposed trip when it came up in conversation, which made him question whether she had been honest from the start.

“Once again, I felt like I had completely wasted my time,” he wrote. “Catfishing on dating apps honestly feels too common now, and it’s not in the sense that the person looks a bit different in real life. Most of the time, they look noticeably worse in person.”

“Just don’t repeat your mistake again.”

Under the post, one Reddit user advised the man to “filter” his dates more carefully in the future and to “put up” boundaries.

“I am kind of amazed by your persistence, but do have self-respect,” they added. “Being nice doesn’t make you a good person. You need to be kind to yourself first before others—that’s a requirement!”

Another commented, “Dude, once a gal sends you her dating requirements in about 200 words, RUN, and don’t look back.”

A third wrote, “Well, at least you saved yourself from a not-so-good option… imagine you dated her for 3 years and then broke up—you even wasted more time, money, and your feelings.”

A fourth said, “Well, lesson learnt. Just don’t repeat your mistake again.”

Others also suggested steering clear of restaurants for first dates. 

One told him, “Maybe next time for first dates, go to more casual places like small cafes that serve meals. Female perspective—If she’s sincere in getting to know you, it shouldn’t matter that the first date isn’t at a fancy restaurant. After a few dates, if you really enjoy the company, go for something fancy then. It will be much more memorable, too.”

In other news, a Singaporean marketing professional says she was left shocked and demoralised after overhearing colleagues in the office attributing her career success to her appearance rather than her skills.

The woman, who has recently led several high-profile marketing campaigns, described the incident in detail on Reddit: “I was in the toilet cubicle and a few of my female colleagues walked in. They didn’t know I was there. They started talking about me, saying that the only reason I’m getting these lead roles is that I’m young and attractive.

Read more: ‘They ignore all my effort because of my looks’: Young professional frustrated as colleagues credit success to appearance